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THE HOTTENTOT 

By VICTOR MAPES and WILLIAM COLLIER 



SAMUEL FRENCH, 28-30 West 38th St., New York 


The Touch-Down 

A comedy in lour acts, by Marion Short. 8 males, 6 females, but 
any number of characters can be introduced in the ensembles. Cos¬ 
tumes modern. One interior scene throughout the play. Time, 2$4 
hours. 

This play, written for the use of clever amateurs, is the story of 
life in Siddell, a Pennsylvania co-educational college. It deals with 
the vicissitudes and final triumph of the Siddell Football Eleven, and 
the humorous and dramatic incidents connected therewith. 

“The Touch-Down 1 ' has the true varsity atmosphere, college songs 
are sung, and the piece is lively and entertaining throughout. High 
schools will make no mistake in producing this play. We strongly 
recommend it as a high-class and well-written comedy. 

Price, 30 Cents. 

Hurry, Hurry, Hurry 

A comedy in three acts, by LeRoy Arnold. 5 males, 4 females. 
One interior scene. Costumes modern. Plays 2 % hours. 

The story is based on the will of an eccentric aunt. It stipulates 
that her pretty niece must be affianced before she is twanty-one, and 
marr.ed to her fiance within a year, if she is to get her spinster 
relative’s million. Father has nice notions of honor and fails to tell 
daughter about the will, so that she may make her choice untram 
mcled by any other consideration than that of true love. The action 
all takes place in the evening the midnight of which will see her 
reach twenty-one. Time is therefore short, and it is hurry, hurry, 
hurry, if she is to become engaged and thus save her father from 
impending bankruptcy. 

The situations are intrinsically funny and the dialogue is sprightly. 
The characters are natural and unaffected and the action moves with 
a snap such as should be expected from its title. Price, 30 Cents, 

The Varsity Coach 

A three-act play of college life, by Marion Short, specially adapted 
to performance by amateurs or high school students. S males 6 
females, but any number of boys and girls may be introduced in the 
action of the play. Two settings necessary, a college boy’s room and 
the university campus. Time, about 2 hours. 

Like many another college boy, “Bob” Selby, an all-round popular 
college man, becomes possessed of the idea that athletic prowess is 
more to be desired than scholarship. He is surprised in the midst of 
a “spread” in his room in Regatta week by a visit from his Hunt 
who is putting him through college. Aunt Serena, “a lady of the old 
school and the dearest little woman in the whole world,” has hastened 
to make this visit to her adored nephew under the mistaken impression 
that he is about to receive the Fellowes prize for scholarship. Her 
grief and chagrin when she learns that instead of the prize Robert 
has received “a pink card,” which is equivalent to suspension for poor 
scholarship, gives a touch of pathos to an otherwise jolly comedy of 
oollege life. How the repentant Robert more than redeems himself, 
carries off honors at the last, and in the end wins Ruth, the faithful 
little sweetheart of the “Prom” and the classroom, makes a story of 
dramatic interest and brings out very clearly certain phases of modern 
college life. There are several opportunities for the introduction of 
college songs and “stunts.” Price, 30 Cents. 

(The Above Are Subject to Royalty When Produced) , 


SAMUEL FRENCH, 28*30 West 38th Street, New York City 

Nwr and Explicit Oeseriptiva Catalogue bailed Fret as .teqwst 




i 


£os . 


The Hottentot 



A FARCE IN THREE ACTS 


BY 


VICTOR MAPES and WILLIAM COLLIER 


Copyright, 1922, by Samuel French 


All Rights Reserved 


CAUTION.—Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned 
that “THE HOTTENTOT,” being fully protected un¬ 
der the copyright laws of the United States and Great 
Britain, is subject to a royalty and anyone presenting the 
play without the consent of the authors or their authorized 
agents will be liable to the penalties by law provided. 
Application for the amateur acting rights must be made 
to Samuel French, 28-30 West 38th Street, New York. 


New York 
SAMUEL FRENCH 
Publisher 

28-30 West 38th Street 


London 

SAMUEL FRENCH, Ltd. 
26 Southampton Street 
STRAND 





Especial notice should be taken that the possession of 
this book without a valid contract for production first 
having been obtained from the publisher, confers no right 
or license to professionals or amateurs to produce the play 
publicly or in private for gain or charity. 

In its present form this play is dedicated to the reading 
public only, and no performance, representation, produc¬ 
tion, recitation, or public reading may be given except by 
special arrangement with Samuel French, 28-30 West 38th 
Street, New York. 

This play may be presented by amateurs upon payment 
of a royalty of Twenty-Five Dollars for each perform¬ 
ance, payable to Samuel French, 28-30 West 38tn Street, 
New York, one week before the date when the play is 
given. 

Whenever the play is produced the following notice must 
appear on all programs, printing and advertising for the 
play: “Produced by special arrangement with Samuel 
French of New York.” 

Attention is called to the penalty provided by law for 
any infringement of the author’s rights, as follows: 

“Section 4966 :—Any person publicly performing or rep¬ 
resenting any dramatic or musical composition for which 
copyright has been obtained, without the consent of the 
proprietor of said dramatic or musical compositions, or his 
heirs and assigns, shall be liable for damages thereof, 
such damages, in all cases to be assessed at such sum, not 
less than one hundred dollars for the first and fifty dol¬ 
lars for every subsequent performance, as to the court 
shall appear to be just. If the unlawful performance and 
representation be wilful and for profit, such person or 
persons shall be. guilty of a misdemeanor, and upon con¬ 
viction shall be imprisoned for a period not exceeding one 
year.”— U. S. Revised Statutes: Title 60, Chap. 3. 


©CI.D «!} 1 3 8 

DEC 22’22 




The following is a copy of the playbill of the first per¬ 
formance of “THE HOTTENTOT” at the George M. 
Cohan Theatre, New York, March 1, 1920: 


* 


fO 


c 

r* 


SAM H. HARRIS 
Presents 

THE HOTTENTOT 

A FARCE IN THREE ACTS 


By 

VICTOR MAPES and WILLIAM COLLIER 
(Staged under the direction of Sam Forrest,) 


CAST OF CHARACTERS 

(In the order in which they first appear) 

Celise . Dorie Sawyer 

Ollie Gilford . Frederick Karr 

Mrs. Ollie Gilford (May) . Helen Walcott 

Swift .... Donald Meek 

Alec Fairfax . Arthur Howard 

Mrs. Chadwick .. Ann Andrews 

Peggy Fairfax . Frances Carson 

Larry Gilford .. Calvin Thomas 

Perkins . Edwin Taylor 

Sam Harrington . William Collier 

Capt. Reggie Townsend . Howard Hull Gibson 


SCENES 

Act I. The living-room of the Gilford's country 
home. Morning. 

Act 11. The same. Evening. 

Act III. A hillside clearing. The following day. 

The action takes place in a fashionable hunting 
community near New York City. 

3 













THE HOTTENTOT 


A FARCE 


By 

VICTOR MAPES and WILLIAM COLLIER 


First Performance, 

January 1 2 th, 1920, 
Apollo Theatre, 
Atlantic City, N. J. 


The Hottentot 


ACT I. 


Scene: The living-room of the Gilford’s country 
home. Morning. 

At Rise : Celise, the maid, enters up r. with mail. 
Ollie Gilford enters through French window 

up c. 


Ollie. Any mail for me, Celise? 

Celise. Oui, Monsieur. (Gives him two let¬ 
ters.) 

Ollie. Thanks. 

Celise. And one for Madam. (Gives him an¬ 
other letter.) 

Ollie. Oh. (Takes letter, goes l. to stairway 
and calls.) May, here’s a letter for you. 

May. (Speaking from top of stairs) Thanks, 

Ollie. 

(She comes down the stairs, Ollie gives her the 
letter, she crosses down l. and sits, reading. 
Swift, the butler, enters up r. Crosses to 
Celise.,) 

Swift. Any mail for me, Celise? 

7 


8 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Celise. I am not a letter-carrier. 

Swift. You have the mail there, haven’t you? 
Celise. Oui, but I do not deliver mail to serv¬ 
ants. 

Swift. Servants? 

Celise. Oui, servants! (Snaps her fingers in his 
face. . He glares at her and snaps his fingers in her 
face.) J’en ai assez de vous. Alors fische moi le 
camp et laise moi faire. 

Swift. How dare you. (To Ollie.,) Did you 
hear that, sir, did- 

May. Swift, will you please stop your quarreling. 
(To Celise .) Celise, that will do. 

Celise. (Glares at Swift.,) Huh! 

Swift. (Mimics her) Huh! 

Ollie. Swift, stop quarreling! (Celise exits 

Up R.) 

Swift. Yes, sir. And pardon me, Mr. Gilford, 
but if you’re going to run this house the first half 
of the week as a dwelling, and the last half as a 
hotel, might I suggest that you get a porter. 

Ollie. A porter ? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Ollie. To help you do the work? 

Swift. Not to help. To do it. 

Ollie. (Humoring him) I’ll think over your 
suggestion. 

Swift. I would if I were you. 

(He exits up r. Alec Fairfax enters up c. He is 
dressed in riding clothes.) 

Alec. Good morning, May, Ollie. (Crosses down 
r. and puts hat, gloves and riding crop on divan.) 
Ollie. Have a nice ride, Alec? 

Alec. Yes, great. 

Ollie. (Rises and goes c.) Has your friend Mr. 
Harrington arrived yet? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


9 


Alec. (Crossing to Ollie,) He’s not my friend, 
he’s Mrs. Chadwick’s friend. He doesn’t arrive un¬ 
til dinner time. 

Ollie. Oh. 

Alec. And why did you switch him off on me, 
why do I have to put Mr. Harrington up at my 

place ? 

Ollie. Every room in the house is occupied. 

(They go up c. Swift enters up r., goes to outside 
door, opens it and admits Mrs. Chadwick. 
Comes down and announces her.) 

Swift. Mrs. Chadwick. (Exits up r.) 

May. Hello, Carol. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing to May with out¬ 
stretched hands) Well, May, here I am; it is good 
to see you again. 

Ollie. (Comes down c.) Carol. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Turns to him, gives him both 
her hands) Ollie. And how is the handsome gen¬ 
tleman farmer? 

Alec. (Crossing down l. of table) Handsome 
gentleman farmer? 

Ollie. (Over his shoulder to Alec,) Yes, that’s 
what she said. (To Mrs. Chadwick .) I’m fine. 
And you, you’re more beautiful than ever. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Isn’t he priceless? 

Ollie. If I were twenty years younger, and had 
a little more hair- 

May. Yes, and even then you wouldn’t be right. 
(All laugh. Ollie exits up the stairs L.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Notices Alec for the first 
time) And Alec. 

Alec. It’s my turn now. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing to him) You dar¬ 
ling boy. 

Alec. Carol. (Sighs, kisses both her hands.) 



10 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Mrs. Chadwick. (To Ollie and MayJ Isn't 
he poisonous? (To Alec.) I could hardly wait 

to- (Her manner changes as thought strikes her.) 

What in the world are you doing here—what about 
your guest, Sam Harrington? 

Alec. Well, what about him? 

Mrs. Chadwick. He was taking the nine o’clock 
train, it must be here now. 

Alec. It is here, but you told me he’d be out for 
dinner. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Did I? 

Alec. Yes, you did. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Call up the house and see if 
he’s come. 

Alec. Why, of course. (Goes to table r. and picks 
up phone.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. Isn’t it poisonous the way I 
forget things? 

Alec. (In phone) Hello, give me 137 please. 

Ollie. Did you have a nice run out? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Gorgeous, perfectly gorgeous; 
in my new car. Have you seen my new town car? 

Ollie. No. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh, my dear, a divine color, 
mauve; with the sweetest wheels. An hour and ten 
minutes from town, and only arrested twice. The 
most gorgeous policeman, so it didn’t cost me a 
cent. Not bad, was it? 

May. Bad ? Great! 

Alec. (In phone) Hello, Parker? Have you 
had any word from Mr. Harrington? What, he’s 
been there half an hour? Put him on. (To Mrs. 
ChadwickJ Mr. Harrington’s been at my house 
for half an hour. (In phone.) Hello, Mr. Har¬ 
rington? This is Alec Fairfax speaking, I must 
apologize for not being there, but I didn’t know 
you were coming so early. Well, why don’t you 
come over here to my sister’s, Mrs. Gilford’s, it’s 


THE HOTTENTOT 


ii 


only a few minutes’ ride from there? Yes, we’re all 
waiting, Mrs. Gilford, Mrs. Chadwick. Yes, Miss 
Fairfax is waiting too. What? You’d like to see 
Miss Fairfax again? Well, come over then. 

May. Does Peggy know Mr. Harrington? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes, yes. I introduced them 
out west. 

(She crosses r. and stands at Alec’s elbow, trying 
to hear what Sam is saying over the phone.) 

Alec. (In phone) Yes, I know, but listen. Per¬ 
kins, my groom, will fix you out with some of my 

riding clothes and- (Pause. Laughs. Turns to 

Mrs. Chadwick. ,) He says he doesn’t want the 
riding clothes, he wants to know if I have a walk¬ 
ing suit, he’s in a hurry. (In phone.) Now listen, 
Perkins will come over with you. Now jump on 
one of my horses and- 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Snatches phone from Alec’s 
hand) Is that you, Sam? Hello, Sammie, this is 
Carol. I’m awfully sorry this happened, but I told 
Alec that you were coming out this morning, and he 
thought I said afternoon. (To Alec.,) Didn’t you, 
Alec? (Before he can answer she imitates his voice 
in phone.) Yes! (Continues in her natural voice.) 
Do you mind, very much? Yes, but can’t you 
amble gently over? I can’t explain now, but please 
do as you’re told—for my sake?—that’s simply price¬ 
less of you. Thanks. (Hangs up, gives a sigh of 
relief.) There, that’s over. (Crosses to c.) 

Alec. (Crossing to her) Carol, what sort of a 
chap is this Harrington? Is he a regular guy, or 
is he one of those dancing tea hounds? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Why, he’s a wonderful chap. 
He dances of course; but he’s crazy about horses, 
and just mad about steeplechasing. (Turns and 
goes up h.) Come on, May, I want to powder my 




12 


THE HOTTENTOT 


nose, I must look a sight. Same room I suppose? 

May. (Rises and follows) Yes, dear, I always 
save that room for you. Etc., etc. 

(Mrs. Chadwick and May exit l., talking ad lib. 
Ollie enters down the stairs. Peggy Fairfax 
and Larry Crawford enter up c. laughing and 
talking ad lib. Both are dressed in riding 
clothes. A general greeting from all.) 

Ollie. Have a nice ride, folks? 

Peggy. Wonderful. 

Larry. Great. 

Peggy. Has Mr. Harrington arrived yet? 

Alec. No, not yet. 

Peggy. Well, who's going to win the big race to¬ 
morrow ? 

Alec. I am. 

Larry. Yes you are. 

Alec. Yes I am, on my horse Niblic. 

(All laugh, Ollie and Alec stroll up c. and stand 
just outside window talking in Pantomime.) 

Peggy. Well, who is going to win it? 

Larry. I know who could win it. 

Peggy. Who? 

Larry. Your horse Bountiful—if you'd let me 
ride her. 

Peggy. No, I don’t think I’ll enter Bountiful to¬ 
morrow. 

Larry. Well, you’d like to win this race, wouldn’t 
you? 

Peggy. Win, who wouldn't? It’s one of the 
things I’ve always dreamed about, to see my own 
horse, and my own colors, come sailing in at the 
head of the field. 

Larry. Then why not let me ride Bountiful? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


13 

Peggy. Well, in the first place, a steeplechase is 
a very dangerous game, for both man and beast. 

Larry. Oh, I’ve ridden dozens of them. 

Peggy. Oh, I’ll admit you’re a splendid rider, but 
there’s always a chance of an accident, and my horse 
might get hurt. 

Larry. “Your horse might get hurt”? (Laugh¬ 
ingly.) I suppose it makes no difference if I break 
a leg ? 

Peggy. (Laughing) Oh, I didn’t mean that, 
Larry. (Seriously.) But suppose I did start Boun¬ 
tiful, and she should get badly beaten? 

Larry. No, that’s only a stall too. 

Peggy. No, it’s a reason. 

Larry. Now you’re not going to pretend- 

Peggy. I’m not pretending anything. 

Larry. Well, then why should I? Now, Peggy, 
you know how very, very fond I am of you—I’ve 
told you. You’ve asked me to wait, and I’ve waited. 
You’ve held me off, and I’ve accepted it without a 
murmur, but there is—a limit to all things. 

Peggy. Please, Larry, I don’t want to listen to 
that now. 

Larry. But you must listen. 

Peggy. (Indignantly) Must? 

Larry. Well, I mean, I’d like you to listen. 

Peggy. Well, that’s better. (Turns and crosses 
up L. to stairway.) You’ll pardon me won’t you, 
Larry, I’m going to change, I won’t be long. (She 
exits up the stairs. Mrs. Chadwick enters up l., 
followed by May, who crosses down l. and sits.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Stops short when she sees him, 
puts her hand over her heart) Larry. 

Larry. Carol. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing to him) Now my 
day is complete. 

Larry. (Taking her hand and kissing it) And 


14 


THE HOTTENTOT 


this is the happiest moment of my life. (Ollie 
crosses down R.c. Alec crosses down l.c.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. Isn’t he priceless. 

Larry. And now for my most unhappy one, I 
must leave you. (Kisses her hand.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh, go on, you darned old 
flatterer. 

Larry. Flatterer? Can one flatter the stars, or 
the moon, or- 

May. Now wouldn’t that make you sick? 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Over her shoulder to May) 
Not me, I love it. (To Larry. ) Go on. 

Larry. That’s all there is, there isn’t any more. 
(Crosses over r. and sits on down-stage arm of 
divan.) 

Ollie. Alec, how about your new purchase, the 
Hottentot ? 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing l.) The Hottentot? 
What a funny name? Is it a car? 

Ollie. No, it’s a horse. ('Mrs. Chadwick sits 
beside May down l.) 

Alec. Don’t ask me anything about the Hotten¬ 
tot, he’s terrible. 

Ollie. What’s the matter, can’t he jump? 

Alec. Jump? He can jump anything, from a 
barn door to a church steeple. The more difficult 
it is, the more he seems to enjoy it. And speed, 
say, when the Hottentot gets the bit in his teeth and 
settles down to business—nobody can hold him. 

Larry. Have you been on him? 

Alec. Yes, I was on him, but I wasn’t on him 
very long. I tried it yesterday and at the end of 
three miles I had to run him into a farmhouse. It 
took five of us to get him back in his stall. 

Ollie. (Goes up r. Calls off) Swift! 

Larry. Are you going to enter him in the steeple¬ 
chase to-morrow? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


15 

Alec. (Crossing down r. to Larry) IT 1 enter 
him if you’ll ride him. 

Larry. Oh, no. Not me. 

('Larry and Alec talk in Pantomime. Swift enters 

up R.) 


Swift. 

Ollie. 

Swift. 

luggage. 

Ollie. 


Did you call, sir? 

Yes, tell Briggs to bring the car for me. 
Briggs has gone to the station for the 


What luggage? 

Why the rest of my luggage. 
Only nine trunks. 


(He exits up r.) 

You can take my car. 


Mrs. Chadwick. 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Ollie. Swift. 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Mrs. Chadwick. 

Ollie. Thanks. 

May. And take Alec. 

Mrs. Chadwick. And Larry. 

Ollie. Take them where? 

May. Wherever you’re going. Can’t you see we 
want to be alone? 

Ollie. (To Alec and Larry) 
hint. 

Alec. (Crossing up c.) Sounds like a hint? 

Larry. (Taking hat and riding crop from table 
and crossing up c.) She'd have to write it to make 
it any plainer than that. 


Sounds like a 


('Ollie, Alec and Larry exit up c. talking ad lib. 
Mrs Chadwick rises and follows them up, 
laughing and kidding with Larry. When they 
are gone she turns to May, her manner changes 
and she shows that she is badly worried about 
something.) 


Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing down l.) May, I’m 


16 THE HOTTENTOT 

afraid I’ve put my foot in it again, it’s about Sam 
Harrington. 

May. You haven’t married him? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Married him? No. This is 
serious. 

May. Well, what is it? 

Mrs. Chadwick. He’s coming here under false 
pretences, and it’s all my fault. Why do I do it, 
why do I always say the easiest thing, May; why 
am I a liar? 

May. I don’t know. What have you done? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Will you give me your word 
you won’t tell? 

May. Of course. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Sits beside May on settee) 
Well, when Peggy was visiting me in California last 
month I introduced her to Sam Harrington, and she 
jumped to the conclusion that he was a great 
rider. 

May. Why should she do that? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Because there is another Sam 
Harrington out there who is a great rider, and she 
confused him with the Sam Harrington who’s com¬ 
ing here. 

May. Well, couldn’t she tell by talking to him? 

Mrs. Chadwick. She could, I suppose, but she 
just didn’t. She only saw Sam once. It seemed 
to be a case of love at first sight, then you know 
her aunt was taken sick and she had to return to 
the east. 

May. Why didn’t you tell Peggy? 

Mrs. Chadwick. I never thought she’d see Sam 
again, and as it seemed to please her to think he was 
a great rider—I let her think so. 

May. Then your Sam Harrington doesn’t ride 
at all? 

Mrs. Chadwick. No! He’s scared to death of 
horses. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


17 

May. Then, Carol, why did you tell Alec he was 
fond of horses? 

Mrs. Chadwick. You know Alec can’t see any¬ 
body who doesn’t care for horses, and as Sam is go¬ 
ing to be Alec’s guest, I wanted Alec to like him. 

May. Well, there’s no particular harm done. 

Mrs. Chadwick. No harm? Did you hear Alec 
tell him to jump on a horse and ride over? 

May. But he doesn’t have to ride over. 

Mrs. Chadwick. But he will. He’s too good a 
sport to object to anything, but if Sam Harrington 
gets on a horse I dread to think of the conse¬ 
quences. 

('Swift enters up r., followed by Perkins, the 
groom, who remains in hallway while Swift 
announces him.) 

Swift. Pardon, mam, may your brother’s groom 
speak to you? 

May. Yes, certainly. 

Swift. (Calls over his shoulder) Perkins. 
('Perkins enters the room, Swift goes down r. to 
divan and arranges pillows.) 

May. What is it, Perkins? 

Perkins. (Crossing down c.) I beg pardon, 
mam, is Mr. Harrington here? 

May. No, not yet. 

Perkins. He hasn’t been here at all? 

May. No. 

Perkins. But he was coming here. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes. 

Perkins. Possibly I’ll find him at the stable. I 
tried to keep up with him but he got away from me. 
(Starts up R.j 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Jumps to her feet and goes to 
him) Got away from you? What do you mean? 
What happened? 


18 THE HOTTENTOT 

Perkins. Why, mam, he started out ahead on his 
horse- 

Mrs. Chadwick. On his horse! 

Perkins. Yes, and I expected he’d take it easy 
till I should overtake him. No sooner does I get 
on my horse than I hears the clatter of hoofs, and 
away they goes streaking up the road to the gate. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Mercy! 

May. What then ? 

Perkins. When I gets up to the gate there ain’t 
nothing in sight, but I followed the Hottentot- 

Mrs. Chadwick. The Hottentot! 

Perkins. Yes, the Hottentot. That’s the horse 
Mr. Harrington was riding. 

May. (Rises and goes to him) In heaven’s 
name why did you give him the Hottentot? 

Perkins. Why, mam, I thought seeing Mr. Har¬ 
rington was such a great rider- 

Mrs. Chadwick. You see, May. Oh! 

May. Who told you Mr. Harrington was a great 
rider ? 

Perkins. Mr. Alec. (To Mrs. Chadwick.,) He 
said you told him. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Never mind that. May, I’m 
dying. Go on. 

Perkins. Well, I followed the Hottentot down 
the lane- 

May. Down the lane? You don’t mean the lane 
with the high garden wall, and the spikes on it? 

Perkins. Yes, some jump that. 

May. Jump? 

Perkins. Yes, Mr. Harrington jumped him over 
the wall. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Reels, half fainting) Are you 
sure? 

Perkins. Sure? Why, I saw him myself, and 
he went over as easy as if he was sitting in a rock¬ 
ing-chair. 






THE HOTTENTOT 


19 


May. Then what? 

Perkins. I rode round to the other side of the 
wall, but I couldn’t find Mr. Harrington or the 
Hottentot. 

May. Perkins, go and find Mr. Gilford and bring 
him here as soon as you can. 

Perkins. Yes, mam. (He exits up c.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Goes up c. with Perkins, 
pushing him off) And hurry ! (Nervous and almost 
hysterical, paces up and down.) Why did I tell him 
to get on that horse? I’ve killed him, that’s what 
I’ve done, I’ve killed him. (Rushes to table and 
picks up phone.) I must telenhone! 

May. Who are you phoning to? 

Mrs. Chadwick. I don’t know! (Puts down 
phone.) I’m so nervous I don’t know what I’m 
doing! ( Runs off up l. talking ad lib.) 

May. (Very much upset and pacing back and 
forth. Turns and sees Swift standing above table) 
Swift, don’t stand there like a dunce! 

Swift. (Nervous also. Crosses to c.) No, mam. 
Where shall I stand? 

May. Don’t stand anywhere! 

Swift. (Crossing down R.j Just move up and 
down. 

May. Yes. 

Swift. Yes. 

May. No! 

Swift. No. 

May. Go and get the medicine chest! 

Swift. The big medicine chest? 

May. Yes, the big one. fSwiFT starts up r.) 
And get the liniment! fSwiFT stops, starts to go 
l .) And some bandages! 

Swift. With mustard, mam? 

May. Mustard? On bandages? 

Swift. Oh, bandages. I thought you said sand¬ 
wiches. 


20 


THE HOTTENTOT 


May. No. bandages! (Crosses up l.) 

Swift. Yes, mam, I understand, bandages. 

(He exits up r. May exits up l. talking ad lib . 
After a slight pause Sam Harrington enters 
through window up c. He is dressed in riding 
clothes. He is covered with dirt, has a long tear 
in the right leg of his breeches, his derby hat 
is broken, and his collar and tie are awry. He 
carries a horse’s bridle in one hand, and in the 
other a whisp of horse’s mane. He comes down 
c., looks about, puts bridle on chair l. of table. 
Feels his shoulder and shows that it pains him. 
Discovers tear in his breeches, turns and goes 
out through window up c. Stands just out¬ 
side window looking about. Swift enters up 
r. with bottle of liniment, goes to table, puts 
bottle down, and pours himself a drink of 
whiskey from decanter on table. He is about 
to drink it when Sam re-enters and stands 
watching him.) 

Swift. (Feels someone watching him, turns, sees 
SamJ Are you Mr. Harrington? ( Sam nods.) 
Have an accident, sir? 

Sam. No, thanks, I just had one. 

Swift. Well, sir, is there anything I can do for 
you? 

Sam. Yes. Tell me, please, whose house is this? 

Swift. Whose house? 

Sam. Yes. Don't you know? 

Swift. Why, yes, sir, I know. 

Sam. But it’s a secret. You won’t tell me. 

Swift. Why, no, sir. This is Mr. Gilford’s house. 
Mr. Oliver Gilford. 

Sam. That’s fortunate. 

Swift. And I’m Swift. 

Sam. So’s the Hottentot. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


21 


Swift. We were all very much frightened. 

Sam. (Crosses down l. and sits) Yes, all of 
us. 

Swift. Perkins told us of your wonderful ride, 
and how you jumped the Hottentot over the wall. 
He said you went over as easily as though you were 
sitting in a rocking-chair, and that when he rode 
around to the other side of the wall neither you or 
the Hottentot were in sight. 

Sam. We hadn’t come down yet. 

Swift. We were fearfully alarmed, sir, we all 
thought you were dead. 

Sam. (Rising and crossing to Swift J Not dead, 
dying. 

Swift. Dying ? 

Sam. (Pointing to drink that Swift still holds 
in his hand) For that. 

Swift. Oh. (Gives him the drink.) We were 
terribly anxious, sir; this liniment was for you. 
(Holds up bottle.) 

Sam. (Drinks) It’s some liniment. 

Swift. No, sir—this is the liniment. That’s very 
fine Scotch; White Plorse Cellar. 

Sam. (Hands Swift the glass) I’m not particu¬ 
larly fond of Scotch. 

Swift. We have some excellent rye. 

Sam. That’s better. 

Swift. You won’t have a drink? 

Sam. Who won’t? 

Swift. I mean —will you? 

Sam. Yes. (Notices horse's mane for the first 
time, it is tangled up in the fingers of his left hand. 
He pulls it off and throws it to Swift, who catches 
it.) Here! 

Swift. (Holding it up) Why, Mr. Harrington, 
it’s part of a horse’s mane. 

Sam. Yes, it came out when he stopped. 

Swift. What shall I do with it, sir? 


2« THE HOTTENTOT 

Sam. Put it back on the horse. I don’t care what 
you do with it. 

Swift. (Picks up bridle from chair) Shall I take 
this too? 

Sam. Yes, that came of? too. 

Swift. Came off? 

Sam. Yes, all three of us came off together. 

Swift. I’ll get the rye. 

(Takes tray with decanter, siphon, and glasses; bot¬ 
tle of liniment, bridle, and horse's mane, and 
exits up r. Long business for Sam —feels 
tooth, takes cigar from pocket, it is broken and 
falls to pieces. He takes cigarette from humidor 
on table and lights it. Takes watch from 
pocket, looks at it, shakes it, holds it to his ear, 
shakes it again, sighs and puts it back in pocket. 
Swift re-enters up r. with a decanter of rye 
and whiskey glass on small tray. Goes to table, 
puts tray down and starts to pour Sam’s drink. 
He pours a “gentleman's drink" and waits for 
Sam to stop him, Sam says nothing, he looks at 
him, pours a little■ more and looks at him again.) 

Sam. Who named you Swift? ("Swift laughs, 
fills glass and hands it to him. Sam drinks.) That’s 
very good rye. (Drinks again.) Have you much of 
this in the house? 

Swift. We have a cellar full. 

Sam. That’s where I should have been thrown. 
(Hands Swift the glass, then gives him money.) 

Swift. (Putting money in his pocket) Thank 
you, sir. (Picks up tray and starts to exit up rJ 

Sam. Oh, Swift. The less said about this horse 
affair the better. You understand? 

Swift. Yes, sir, I know how to hold my tongue. 

Sam. Well, if you keep hold of it you can’t tell 
anyone. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


23 


Swift. (Laughing) Yes, sir, keep hold of it and 
I can’t tell anyone. That’s very good. (Starts to 
go, stops.) And Mr. Harrington, any time you wish 

a drink just touch the bell there- (Points to tap 

bell on table.) And I’ll have it here in a jiffy. 
(Laughs again.) Keep hold of my tongue and I 
can’t tell anyone. I must remember that. 

Sam. (Feeling in his pocket for pencil and paper) 
I’ll write it down for you. 

Swift. Yes, sir, and don’t forget the bell. 

Sam. Don’t forget the rye. 

Swift. No, sir, I’ll always have a drink ready for 
you, sir. 

Sam. You better have two ready, I may ring 
twice. 

Swift. Yes, sir. (Exits up r. still laughing.) 

Sam. Jolly person. (Crosses down c. and stands 
feeling his tooth.) Yes, I’ll lose that one too. (Mrs. 
Chadwick enters up l. Stops short when she sees 
SamJ 

Mrs. Chadwick. Sam! 

Sam. (Starts, turns and sees Mrs. Chadwick, 
gives a sigh of relief) I thought that horse had 
followed me in here. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing down c.) My, 
what a scare you gave me. 

Sam. Scare? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes, when I heard they’d put 
you on the Hottentot my heart just stood still. 

Sam. Your heart? Mine isn’t going yet. Why 
did you make me get on that horse? 

Mrs. Chadwick. I ? 

Sam. Yes. Didn’t you tell me over the phone to 
get on a horse and amble gently over? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes. 

Sam. Well, I did. Over everything between here 
and Alec’s house. I tell you that Hop and Trot is 
some horse. 


24 THE HOTTENTOT 

Mrs. Chadwick. Sam, dear, it was all a mis¬ 
take— 

Sam. Of course it was a mistake. I never should 
have gotten on a horse, you know that. I haven’t 
been on a horse in six years until today. I hate the 
sight of a horse, I’m scared to death of a horse. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes, but there’s no reason why 
anyone here should know that. 

Sam. I don’t care who knows it. 

Mrs. Chadwick. But I do. Sam, dear, you don’t 
understand, these people here are crazy about 
horses. 

Sam. You know why they’re crazy? 

Mrs. Chadwick. No. 

Sam. From being thrown on their heads so often. 
(She crosses l. and sits.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. But don’t you see what an aw¬ 
ful position it would place me in? 

Sam. How? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Why if they found out you 
couldn’t ride we’d never hear the end of it. 

Sam. I don’t care what they think, any of them. 

Their opinion of me doesn’t amount to- (Starts 

to snap his fingers , winces with pain , feels his 
thumb.) Thumb’s gone too. (Crosses up c.) You 
and your horses. 

Mrs. Chadwick. You don’t want Peggy Fair¬ 
fax to know it, do you? 

Sam. You don’t mean to tell me Miss Fairfax is 
crazy about horses too? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Why she’s worse than all the 
rest, she’s mad about horses, and a mighty poor wel¬ 
come you’d get from her if she thought you didn’t 
like them. 

Sam. Then don’t tell her. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Rises and crosses to him) I 
don’t intend to, she thinks you’re a wonderful rider. 

Sam. She does? 



THE HOTTENTOT 25 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes. She thinks you’re the 
famous S. Harrington, the rider out west. 

Sam. Not the Californian? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes. 

Sam. The hurdle jumper? (Indicates it with his 
hand.) That one? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes. 

Sam. Well, let her think so. 

Mrs. Chadwick. I fully intended to. 

Sam. I mean, don’t say anything to her about my 
having been thrown. You don’t mind if I light 
this? 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crosses to him) Mind? I 
think it’s very sweet of you. (Takes cigarette from 
him, crosses down l. and sits smoking. Swift en¬ 
ters up r. with drink on tray, he comes down R. of 
Sam.) 

Sam. (To Swift) You heard the bell? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. That’s the rye? 

Swift. (Nods) Rye. 

Sam. Carol, you don’t mind if I - (Holding 

up drink.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. Mind? (Starts to rise.) No, 
and don’t you say anything to anyone else. 

Sam. You know I wouldn’t say anything. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Looking him over) Sam, is 
that the best riding suit you could pick out? 

Sam. It was all right for the occasion. I was so 
frightened that I grabbed the first suit I could find. 
These are not mine. 

Mrs. Chadwick. No? 

Sam. No, everything I have on belongs to Mr. 
Fairfax. Hat and everything. (Points to battered 
hat on table.) Wail ’till he sees them. (Notices dirt 
on his tie, starts brushing it with his cuff.) 

Mrs, Chadwick, Well, if you don’t want Peggy 


26 THE HOTTENTOT 

to know you were thrown, hadn’t you better brush 
up a bit? 

Sam. (Continues brushing) I’m brushing, I’m 
brushing. (Goes to table r. and rings tap-bell. After 
he has done it he realizes that Swift will bring him 
a drink, smiles. Takes cigarette from humidor on 
table. Lights it.) Oh, Carol. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes. 

Sam. Stay where you are, stay where you are. 
(She sits. Sam drinks.) Oh, Swift. 

Swift. Yes, sir? 

Sam. Do you know where you could get me a 
comb and brush? (Notices Swift’s bald head.) 
You wouldn’t have one of your own, I know. 

Swift. Yes, sir, I’ll get them for you. 

Sam. And a mirror? 

Swift. A mirror, yes, sir. 

Sam. I want to fix up a bit. ('Swift exits up r. 
with tray and empty glass. Horses’ hoof are heard 
approaching off l. Sam is frightened, he rmis up l. 
and waits till they have passed.) They don’t come in 
here, do they ? Oh, how I hate that sound. (Crosses 
down l. to Mrs. Chadwick.) Now remember, 
Carol, while I’m in this house I don’t get on a horse 
again, not even a Shetland pony. (Crosses r.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Rises, crosses to c.) You 
won’t have a chance to. 

Sam. I know, but suppose Mr. Fairfax, or some 
of these people who are crazy about horses, ask me 
to go riding with them? 

Mrs. Chadwick. I’ll arrange all that. I’ll take 
you out in the car with me after lunch, and if Alec 
should want you to ride—simply say you have an 
engagement with me. Call me up, and I’ll send the 
car right over. 

Sam. Sounds attractive enough, but a trifle scan¬ 
dalous. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Nonsense, they all know me. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


*7 

Sam. That’s what I mean. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Goes up l.) Peggy’s upstairs, 
do you want to see her? 

Sam. What do you suppose I came all the way 
from California for, and got on that wild horse? 
Of course I want to see her. 

Mrs. Chadwick. I’ll tell her. (She exits up the 
stairs L.) 

Sam. Thank you. 

("Swift enters up r. with comb and brush and 
mirror.) 

Swift. Mr. Harrington. ("Sam takes comb and 
brush. Gives Swift money.) Thank you, sir. 

("Sam sits l. of table and combs his hair, while Swift 
holds the mirror for him, he gradually lowers 
it unconsciously until Sam can no longer see 
himself. Sam pushes it up. Business is re¬ 
peated a second time. Sam brushes the back of 
his head very gingerly because of large lump. 
In watching him Swift again lowers the mir¬ 
ror.) 

Sam. Are you sitting down? 

Swift. No, sir. (Sam continues to brush hair.) 
Will you allow me, sir? (Smoothes Sam’s hair down 
in back.) 

Sam. Easy there. Do you feel that? 

Swift. (Feeling lump) Indeed I do, sir. 

Sam. You ought to see the rock I broke with 
that. (Hands comb and brush to Swift and starts 
to fix his collar and tie. Swift in trying to put 
comb and brush together again lowers mirror, this 
time almost to the floor.) Throw it on the floor, 
throw it on the floor. 

Swift. I beg your pardon. 


28 THE HOTTENTOT 

fS wift holds mirror on a level with his own chest. 
Sam stands up and it is too low, stoops to where 
it is. As he does so Swift raises the mirror to 
where Sam was. Sam grabs it and lifts it to 
proper height. Finishes adjusting his tie.) 

Sam. That looks a little better, doesn’t it? 

Swift. Very much better, sir. (Puts mirror and 
comb and brush on table. Takes whiskbroom from 
pocket.) If I may have your coat, sir. 

Sam. (As Swift helps him off with coat) You 
can have it, it isn’t mine. 

Swift. No? 

Sam. Everything I have on belongs to Mr. Fair¬ 
fax. 

Swift. Indeed. (Takes coat, goes out through 
window up c. and shakes it. The dust makes him 
sneeze.) 

Sam. God bless you. 

Swift. Thank you, sir. 

(While Swift is brushing coat, Sam goes to table, 
takes mirror, smoothes his hair, and tries to see 
the back of his head. Swift finishes brushing 
coat, comes down and starts to put it on Sam, 
the left arm first.) 

Sam. No, no. The right arm first. I start every¬ 
thing with the right arm, and the right foot. 
Swift. Are you superstitious, sir? 

Sam. Yes, very. (Puts coat on, Swift pulls it 
down in the back, repeats business and throws Sam 
off his balance.) 

Swift. I beg your pardon, sir. (Starts to brush 
trousers, the left knee first.) 

Sam. No, no. The right knee first. 

Swift. Yes, of course. (Brushes right knee. 
Sam winces with pain.) 


THE HOTTENTOT 


29 

Sam. Oh! (Sits l. of table, rubbing his knee.) 

Swift. I’m very sorry, sir. 

Sam. So am I. I forgot to tell you, that’s where 
he bit me. (Rises and Swift continues to brush 
his trousers, very carefully.) Easy now, easy. 
('Swift flicks the dirt off with his finger nail, Sam 
watches him a moment.) Don’t brush it off, kill it, 
kill it. ('Swift rises, crosses to table, picks up comb, 
brush and mirror. Sam goes to him and gives him 
money.) 

Swift. Thank you, sir. (Looking at money.) 
Are you going to be here long? 

Sam. No, just a few days, that’s all. 

Swift. I’m sorry. 

(Exits up r. Sam straightening his clothes notices 
the tear in his trousers, starts feeling the lapels 
of his coat for a pin. Peggy enters up l. She 
has changed her riding clothes for an afternoon 
frock.) 

Peggy. (Crossing to him) Mr. Harrington. 
(Holds out her hand.) 

Sam. (Has been holding tear together with his 
right hand, switches quickly and they shake hands) 
How do you do, Miss Fairfax, how do you do. 

Peggy. I’m awfully pleased to see you again. 

Sam. (Still shaking hands) Thank you. I was 
going to say that myself, but I was so pleased at 
seeing you that I forgot it. 

Peggy. I can’t tell you how pleased I am. 

Sam. (Still shaking hands) I was going to say 
that too. (Again switches hands, so that when he 
leaves her he can hide the tear. Holds his trousers 
with his right and shakes her hand with his left.) 
Have you been well? 

Peggy. Yes, thank you- 

Sam. (Drops her hand and backs away from 


THE HOTTENTOT 


30 

her, going l.) You’ll pardon me a moment? I’m 
not going, I just want to find something. (Looks 
about on table.) 

Peggy. What ? 

Sam. I want to find a pin. 

Peggy. A pin ? 

Sam. Yes. Not to pick it up for luck or any¬ 
thing, although I would do that-, I’m very super¬ 
stitious. The truth is, Miss Fairfax, something is 
torn. 

Peggy. What is it? 

Sam. Well, it isn’t my coat. 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. And it isn’t my waist-co.at. 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. And I haven’t any hat on. 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. And there you are. (He opens the rent in 
his trousers, closes it quickly.) 

Peggy. How did you do that? 

Sam. Oh, I didn’t do it, these are not mine. You 
see they phoned me to put on some of your brother’s 
riding clothes, and get on a horse and get over here 
as quickly as I could—which I did. Your brother 
must have had a terrible fall in these. 

Peggy. Well, there’s only one thing to do with 
that. 

Sam. What? 

Peggy. (Crossing to cabinet L. and getting work- 
basket) Sew it up. 

Sam. Oh, don’t bother about that. 

Peggy. (Crosses r. in front of Sam, turns and 
takes his hand) Come here, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Please don’t bother, Miss Fairfax. 

Peggy. Come here. (Takes his hand and leads 
him down R. to table . Puts work-basket on table, 
as she does so she accidentally rings the tap-bell. 
Sam grins, knowing Swift will bring him a drink . 


THE HOTTENTOT 


3i 


She finds needle and thread, turns to him, he is still 
holding her hand, thinking, and does not notice it. 
She looks at her hand, then at him. He releases 

it.) 

Sam. I beg your pardon. (She smiles.) Ready? 

Peggy. Yes. (He raises his knee, trying to bal¬ 
ance on one foot, almost falls. She laughs. You 
can’t stand that way. (She kneels down and starts 
to sew, she tickles him, he squirms, laughs and 
backs away.) 

Sam. I wasn’t ready then. (She starts to sew 
again and again tickles him.) Don’t bother about 
sewing it, we can just pin it up, safety pin, any¬ 
thing. 

Peggy. No, you come here and I’ll sit down. (She 
sits l. of table, Sam crosses to her and she starts 
to sew.) 

Sam. You know it seems a shame to have you — 
("Peggy tickles him with the needle. He jumps, 
crosses l., holding his leg. Puts hand inside the tear 
in his breeches, takes it out, looks at it, finds there 
is blood on it. Nods.) Do you have to use such a 
long needle? 

Peggy. I’m so sorry. 

Sam. (Crosses back to her, holds breeches away 
from his leg. Maybe you’d better hold it out, like 
this. (She starts sewing. Swift enters up r. with 
drink on tray, pauses a moment, then comes down 
r. of table, leans over and tries to pass it to Sam. 
Peggy has her back to Swift and does not see him. 
Sam makes several attempts to get the drink but 
fails.) Miss Fairfax, would it help any if I stood a 
little closer? Get at it better. 

Peggy. Yes. 

("Sam moves a step nearer, leans over the back of 
her chair but still can't reach it. Swift is lean¬ 
ing over the other chair and holding to it, it 


32 


THE HOTTENTOT 


tips with him, he loses his balance and almost 
falls.) 

Sam. (To Swift) Never mind, never mind. 

Peggy. (Looks up) What? 

Sam. (Smiling at her) Nothing. ('Swift goes up 
r., turns and he and Sam talk in Pantomime. Peggy 
looks up and catches Sam, he smiles. Swift exits 
up r. Sam watches her sewing, she has reached the 
top of the tear, up near his pocket.) You’re not sew¬ 
ing the pocket up, are you? 

Peggy. (Laughs) No. (She stops sewing, turns 
and gets scissors from basket.) 

Sam. You’ll be careful with those, won’t you? 

Peggy. (Laughs, cuts thread) There. ('Sam 
looks down at his pants, she has sewed them very 
badly, so close to his leg that he can't move them. 
Long business of trying to do so.) What’s the mat¬ 
ter ? 

Sam. It’s shirred, isn’t it? 

(Continues to work with his pants, discovers that 
she has sewed them to his undenvear. Puts his 
hand down inside his pants to make sure. 
Crosses to settee l., tries to sit, gets up quickly 
finding that he cant. He is very much em¬ 
barrassed, backs up stage, trips over bottom 
step of stairway and almost falls.) 

Peggy. What is it? 

Sam. I think you’ve sewed them to the I. O. U.’s. 
It’s all right, I never tried it that way before, but it 
sort of keeps things together more. 

Peggy. But it looks awful. 

Sam. It doesn’t matter, I can keep my hand 
over it. 

Peggy. (After a slight pause) Well, wouldn’t 
you like to sit down? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


33 


Sam. I’d like to, yes. 

(Crosses down r. of table and tries to sit, rises 
quickly, the only way he can manage it is by 
sitting sideways, and stretching his right leg 
straight out in front of him.) 

Peggy. Have you any idea how long it is since 
we last met? 

Sam. About a month. 

Peggy. Yes. You were awfully nice to auntie 
and me. No wonder she liked you. 

Peggy. When did you leave California? 

Sam. About a week ago. 

Peggy. California. (Sighs.) 

Sam. Some place, isn’t it? 

Peggy. Yes. That was a wonderful trip we had 
to Santa Barbarba. 

Sam. Oh, you remember that trip? 

Peggy. Yes, I’ll never forget it—the orange 
groves- 

Sam. Yes. 

Peggy. Then luncheon at the Mission- 

Sam. Um-hum. 

Peggy. That lovely trip up the mountains, and 
the sea. 

Sam. Do you remember that boat ride? 

Peggy. Yes, the most beautiful boat ride I ever 
had in my life. 

Sam. Yes, smooth. 

Peggy. Yes. 

Sam. That’s the way I like them—smooth. You 
remember how we sat up on the forward deck? 

Peggy. Yes. 

Sam. Auntie, you, and myself—and how I tried 
to get rid of your Auntie? 

Peggy. Yes, and we couldn’t. 

Sam. No, the water was so shallow. 


34 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Peggy. (Laughing) Oh, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. But she didn’t stop us talking, did she? 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. I never saw two peoplo talk so much in my 
life—about everything. 

Peggy. No, that’s what I can’t understand. How 
we could be on that boat for four hours, and talk 
about everything, except the one thing that we both 
love most of all. 

Sam. What ? 

Peggy. Horses. 

Sam. Horses? 

Peggy. Yes, and there I was talking to one of the 
greatest riders in the world. 

Sam. Who, your Aunt? 

Peggy. No, you . 

Sam. Oh, I wouldn’t say “one of the greatest 
riders,” one of the bravest maybe. 

Peggy. Now, no false modesty. You know I’ve 
often wished that I were a man, just long enough 
to ride one steeplechase. 

Sam. That would be plenty long enough. 

Peggy. I think it’s the most exciting sport on 
earth, there’s nothing to compare with it. 

Sam. Nothing, absolutely nothing. 

Peggy. Do you get excited when you ride? 

Sam. (Shakes his head) No, I just become 
numb. 

Peggy. I’m going to tell you something that may 
surprise you a little. 

Sam. Surprise me; what is it? 

Peggy. Well, after we got back east I read in the 
papers about the Burlingame Steeplechase, in which 
you were to ride the Senator’s “Mamie H.” 

Sam. I was to ride? 

Peggy. Yes. Oh, we read it—Mr. S. Harring¬ 
ton. 

Sam. That’s right, Mr. S. Harrington. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


35 

Peggy. Yes, and I was so crazy to see you ride 
that I asked Auntie to return to California, just 
for that event. 

Sam. To see me ride? 

Peggy. Yes. 

('Mrs. Chadwick enters up l. and stands listening.) 

Sam. Well, that was very nice, and quite a sur¬ 
prise. But of course if you saw that race you know 
that- 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crosses down to them, inter¬ 
rupting) But she didn’t. Did you, Peggy? 

Peggy. No, we didn’t. 

Sam. Oh. You didn’t see it? 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. (To Mrs. ChadwickJ Oh. Everything’s 
all right then. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Of course everything’s all 
right. (To Peggy.J Oh, Peggy, May wants you. 

Peggy. (Rises) You’ll pardon me? 

Sam. (Rising) Certainly. ("Peggy crosses up 
l.) You’ll be back? 

Peggy. Yes, I won’t be long. (She exits up l.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. What were you going to tell 
her? That you couldn’t ride? 

Sam. Yes. I forgot. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Sam, you’re simply poison¬ 
ous. Now please be careful. (She crosses down l. 
and sits. Alec enters up c.) Oh, this is Mr. Har¬ 
rington. 

Alec. (Comes down r. of Sam ) I’m awfully glad 
to know you, Mr. Harrington. (They shake hands.) 

Sam. What’s your name ? 

Alec. Alec Fairfax. 

Sam. Alec Fairfax? (Thinks a moment, trying 
to place the name, remembers.) Oh, you’re my host ? 

Alec. Yes. 


36 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Sam. (Shakes his hand) How do you do. I was 
afraid I wasn’t going to meet you while I was stop¬ 
ping at your place. 

Alec. I must apologize for not being there, 
but- 

Sam. Oh, that’s all right, I’m the same way, I 
don’t go home much myself. (Alec laughs.) Some 
very fine horses you have in your barn. 

Alec. Thank you. 

Sam. You’re welcome. 

Alec. What did you think of the Hottentot? 

Sam. I told him what I thought of him. 

Alec. Some jumper, isn’t he? 

Sam. Yes, some jumper. 

Alec. And when it comes to speed, no flies on 
him either. 

Sam. No, a fly couldn’t live on him. 

Alec. Well, did you have any trouble han¬ 
dling him ? 

Sam. (Effects a superior attitude) No. (To 
Mrs. Chadwick .) Did I? 

Mrs. Chadwick. No. 

Sam. The only difficulty I found was that I 
couldn’t get him to go quite high, or as fast, as I 
wanted him to. I can’t understand yet why your 
man gave me a lady’s horse. (Crosses down r.J 

Alec. (Puzzled) I mean, did you get him back 
in the stall all right? 

Sam. Why of course. He’s back there, isn’t he? 

Alec. Yes. 

Sam. The stall’s gone, but he’s back there all 
right. 

Alec. Well, I can’t understand it. 

(Perkins enters up c.) 

Perkins. Mr. Fairfax. 

Alec. Yes? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


37 


Perkins. Your horse is ready, sir. 

Alec. Good. And the Hottentot? 

Perkins. He’s ready too, sir. (He exits up c.) 

Alec. (To Sam) How would you like to jump 
on the Hottentot and shoot him over to the course? 

Sam. I’d like to shoot him right here. 

Alec. (Laughs) Well, I call this the greatest 
bit of luck that ever happened. 

Sam. What? 

Alec. Why, your being here. 

Sam. You don’t know how lucky it is— my being 
here. 

Alec. (Turns to Mrs. Chadwick) Isn’t this 
great? Now listen, the Hottentot is going in the 
race tomorrow, and he’s going to ride him. (Points 
to Sam, hut continues to look at Mrs. Chadwick. 
Sam looks about to see who Alec is pointing at, 
realizes it is him.) 

Sam. Who? 

Alec. You. 

Sam. Oh, no, I’m not. (To Mrs. Chadwick.) 
Got everything all arranged, going out to lunch and 
then she’s going to send the car over for me. Tell 
him you’re going to send the car over for me. Tell 
him, tell him! 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Jumps to her feet and goes 
to Alec) Alec, you want Sam to ride the Hotten¬ 
tot, don’t you? 

Alec. Why sure. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Then let me arrange it. 

Alec. I know, but the Hottentot’s my horse. 
Why can’t I arrange it? 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Leads him up c.) Now I 
know Sam better than you do, if you’ll just leave it 
all to me I’ll make Sam ride for you. 

Alec. Good. (He exits up c.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. You see, Sam, it takes a 
woman to manage a thing like this. 


38 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Sam. All right, then you ride the Hottentot. 

Mrs. Chadwick. You were beginning to stam¬ 
mer and look foolish. 

Sam. Certainly, why shouldn't I? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Now Alec’s an awfully nice 
boy, he asks you to do him a favor, without going 
into all kinds of explanations you can’t refuse him. 

Sam. Oh, yes I can. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh, no you can’t. 

Sam. That kind of a favor? Oh, yes I can. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh, no you can’t! Now it’s 
all very simple, as he won’t take no for an answer 
—say yes. 

Sam. I wouldn’t get on that horse again for any¬ 
body in the world. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Certainly not. But it won’t 
hurt you to say you will. Then before the time 
comes some little thing happens—you turn your 
wrist, sprain your ankle, break your neck- 

Sam. Yes, sure. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Now that’s settled, you’re going 
to ride the Hottentot. (Teggy enters up l. and over¬ 
hears it.) 

Peggy. (Crossing c.) What? 

Mrs. Chadwick. (To Peggy) Yes, Sam’s go¬ 
ing to ride the Hottentot. (To Sam.) Aren’t you, 
Sam? I’m going to tell Alec the good news. (Exits 
up c.) 

Peggy. Mr. Harrington, are you going to ride 
the Hottentot? 

Sam. Yes. 

Peggy. Why ? 

Sam. Well, I’m the only one around here who 
can handle him. 

Peggy. But you mustn’t ride him. 

Sam. ■ Well your brother asked me as a favor- 

Peggy. But Alec shouldn’t ask you to ride the 
Hottentot. It’s true you rode him this morning and 




THE HOTTENTOT 


39 


that it turned out all right, but even so it was an 
awful risk. The Hottentot’s a nasty brute, with a 
cranky and dangerous disposition. 

Sam. Nasty brute? He’s half lion, that horse. 
A terrible horse. 

Peggy. That’s why I’m asking you not to ride 

him. 

Sam. Not to ride him? Don’t you want me to 
ride him? 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. All right, I won’t. That’s how you stand 
with me. 

Peggy. Now you’ve promised me, you won’t ride 
the Hottentot? 

Sam. I’ve promised you, and I’ll keep my word. 

Peggy. (Giving him her hand) Thank you. 

Sam. God bless you. 

Peggy. Now I want you to do me another favor. 

Sam. Anything, Miss Fairfax. 

Peggy. You will? 

Sam. Anything you ask. 

Peggy. You give me your word? 

Sam. I give you my word. 

Peggy. Well, you see I have a horse of my own, 
called Bountiful. She’s very fast, and a safe, sure 
jumper. With a good rider on her there’s no rea¬ 
son why she shouldn’t win. 

Sam. No. 

Peggy. That’s the favor I ask. 

Sam. You want me to root for Bountiful? 

Peggy. No, I want you to ride Bountiful- 

Sam. Oh, Miss Fairfax- 

Peggy. In the steeplechase. 

Sam. But, Miss Fairfax- 

Peggy. There isn’t any “but,” you gave me your 
word. (Crossing up c. to window.) I’m going over 
and tell my groom that you’re going to ride Boun¬ 
tiful. (She exits up c.) 




40 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Sam. This isn’t a home, it’s a stable. (Crosses 
R. to table and rings bell. Strikes his sore thumb, 
winces with pain. Takes cigarette from humidor 
on table, lights it. Swift enters up R. with drink 
on tray, comes down r. of table and stands holding 
it out to Sam. Sam has his back turned and does 
not see him. Turns to put match on ash-tray, sees 
him, is startled, jumps.) 

Swift. I’m sorry, sir. 

Sam. It’s all right, it’s my fault. I did ring 
the bell, but I couldn’t drink anything now—I’m 
too nervous and worried about the hurdle thing 
tomorrow. 

Swift. The Steeplechase ? 

Sam. Yes. 

Swift. Mr. Harrington, you don’t mean to tell 
me you’re going to ride in the Steeplechase to¬ 
morrow ? 

Sam. All the way you mean? I don’t know. A 
few minutes ago I foolishly gave my word of honor 
to Miss Fairfax that I’d ride for her tomorrow. 

Swift. Bountiful? 

Sam. Yes, Bountiful. 

Swift. And you’re nervous about that? 

Sam. Nervous? I should say I am nervous. 
I haven’t been on a horse in six years until today— 
and I wasn’t on that one more than a minute—of 
course I’m nervous. (Crosses down l. and sits.) 

Swift. (Crossing to c.) Yes, sir, I can appre¬ 
ciate that, Mr. Harrington, I felt exactly that way 
before my first Steeplechase. 

Sam. Your first Steeplechase? Why, were you 
a rider? 

Swift. A rider? Why, Mr. Harrington, I was 
one of the best riders here—if I may say so. 

Sam. You may. I don’t care what you say. 

Swift. Yes, sir, I was a great rider until my 
last bad fall. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


4i 


Sam. Did you have a bad fall ? 

Swift. I had terrible fall. 

Sam. So did I. 

Swift. Did you, sir? 

Sam. Yes. Not this one, this is nothing. 

Swift. Another? 

Sam. Yes, six years ago, almost killed myself. 
Settled me'forever with horses. Too bad too be¬ 
cause I was very fond of them up to that time, 
owned a lot of them. But the minute I recovered 
from that fall I told my man to get rid of them— 
get them off the place—don’t wait to sell them, 
give them away. I don’t want to even see a horse 
again, don’t want to even talk about a horse. 

Swift. I never talk about them, sir. 

Sam. Well, we’ll be together a great deal while 
I’m here. That’s all the others seem to talk about, 
horse, horse, horse. So you had a bad fall, eh? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. How did your fall affect you? 

Swift. Shattered my nerves completely, sir. It 
left me a nervous wreck. 

Sam. As far as horses are concerned? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. I’m the same way. If you see a horse, how 
does it affect you? 

Swift. Makes me absolutely ill, break out in a 
cold perspiration- 

Sam. You get weak? 

Swift. Yes, sir, terribly weak. 

Sam. And here —(puts hand on chest )—do you 
ever have this? (Taps chest like a horse trotting.) 
Ta-te-dum, ta-te-dum, ta-te-dum? 

Swift. Yes, sir, I have the same thing. 

Sam. And if you hear a horse- 

Swift. (Yells, going r.) Where is it, Mr. Har¬ 
rington, where is it, where’s the horse? 

Sam. (Frightened, follows him) What is it, 


42 THE HOTTENTOT 

what’s the matter with you, what are you yelling 
about ? 

Swift. The horse. 

Sam. What horse? 

Swift. It’s nothing, sir, it’s my nerves. 

Sam. Do you do that often? 

Sam. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Well, let me know when you’re going to 
do it again. Heavens, you’re worse than I am. 
(Crosses to l.) 

Swift. (Crossing up c.) I can’t understand it, 
sir, this terrible fear I have of horses. You know 
my family were all expert riders. 

Sam. They were? 

Swift. Yes, sir. And my brother, Mr. Harring¬ 
ton—they’ve never had a better rider here than my 
brother. 

Sam. Your brother? Well, as I’ve given my 
word of honor to ride tomorrow I’ll have to ride. 
Won’t I? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. And as I’ll need a great deal of practice, 
and a lot of coaching, don’t you think it would be 
a good idea if I could see your brother, and have 
a talk with him? 

Swift. I wish you could, sir, but my brother is 
dead. 

Sam. I’m sorry, Swift, I beg your pardon. 

Swift. It’s quite all right, sir, how were you to 
know that poor Sam was killed? 

Sam. Who? 

Swift. Sam, my brother Sam. 

Sam. Oh, was his name Sam? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. He was killed, eh? 

Swift. Yes, sir; he was killed in the last Steeple¬ 
chase he rode in. 

Sam. (Sam grows more nervous and uncotnforp - 


THE HOTTENTOT 


43 

able) You say he was killed in the last Steeple¬ 
chase- Of course, it would have to be the last 

one. Where did it happen? 

Swift. Right here, sir. 

Sam. Here? 

Swift. Yes, sir, the same course you ride on to¬ 
morrow. 

Sam. The same horse? 

Swift. No, sir, course. 

Sam. Oh, course. 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Where I ride Bountiful? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. He was killed, eh? 

Sam. I thought you said he was such a wonderful 
rider. 

Swift. He was a splendid rider. 

Sam. Well, what was the matter with him that 
day? 

Swift. Nothing, sir, excepting that it’s a very 
dangerous course. 

Sam.. It is, eh? 

Swift. It’s a terrible course. 

Sam. Well, haven’t they fixed it up or anything 
since his accident? 

Swift. Yes, sir; they’ve widened the jumps. 

Sam. Widened them? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Do they have many accidents here? 

Swift. Yes, sir, a great many. One every race 
at least. 

Sam. At least one a race ? I suppose if they hap¬ 
pened to have a race without one, they’d run it over 
again. 

Swift. (Thinking) Sam. 

Sam. What do you want? 

Swift. Oh, not you, sir, I wouldn’t call you Sam. 
I was thinking of my brother Sam. I shall never 


THE HOTTENTOT 


44 

forget his last race, it was at the water jump. 

Sam. Where? 

Swift. The water jump, that’s the dangerous 
jump. 

Sam. The most dangerous, you mean, they’re all 
dangerous, Swift. 

Swift. Very true, sir. My brother Sam was 
leading at the water jump, his horse stumbled— 
(puts hand over his eyes) —and the way the other 
horses trampled the life- 

Sam. (Unable to control himself any longer) 
Oh, shut up, shut up. That’s all I hear in this 
place—people being kicked, and bitten, and thrown 
over walls, and trampled to death. Don’t you know 
anything pleasant to talk about? Don’t you know 
any riddles? 

Swift. Yes, sir. What’s the difference between 
a horse- 

Sam. There’s no difference, there’s no difference. 

Swift. But it was a terrible thing. 

Sam. Of course it was a terrible thing, and I 
sympathize with you deeply. But don’t keep harp¬ 
ing on it, I’m nervous enough about this race to¬ 
morrow. 

Swift. Poor Sam. 

Sam. What? 

Swift. My brother Sam. 

Sam. Well, say your brother Sam, say your 
brother Sam. 

Swift. Well, Mr. Harrington, is there anything 
I can do for you? 

Sam. No. ("Swift starts up r.J Yes, yes, there 
is. ("Swift returns.) What’s the use of my beat¬ 
ing about the bush any longer, I’ve got to ride—to¬ 
morrow, and I’ve got to have a horse to practice 
with. 

Swift. A horse ? 

Sam. Yes, do you think you can get me one? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


45 


Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Don’t buy it, you know. 

Swift. No, sir. 

Sam. If you buy it you’ll keep it yourself. 

Swift. No, sir; I’ll hire one. 

Sam. Yes, hire one, and do not hire a fancy horse. 

Swift. A what, sir? 

Sam. One like the Hottentot. I don’t want a 
horse that shows his teeth, or one that trembles all 
the time, or goes sideways. I do not want a spirited 
horse. I want a horse that’s had a lot of trouble, a 
home horse, domestic, with a lazy disposition, and a 
wide back. 

Swift. Yes, sir, I know exactly what you mean, 
I know exactly the kind of a horse you want. What 

you want is a nice, gentle- (Goes through the 

motions of riding very slowly and gently.) 

Sam. That’s it, that’s my idea of a race. That’s 
as fast as I want to go, and that’s as high as I want 
to go, too. 

Swift. I know. I know just the kind of a horse 
you want, the kind they have over at the Academy. 

Sam. When you get this horse will you take it 
out in the woods and hide it, and let me know where 
it is—but nobody else? 

Swift. Yes, sir. (Sam gives him money.) Thank 
you, sir. But are you going to ride tonight? 

Sam. Well, if I’m to race tomorrow I’d better take 
a little jaunt. (Voices heard outside , Sam puts his 
fingers to his lips.) Sh. 

Swift. Yes, sir. (He exits up r.) 

^Mrs. Chadwick enters up c., followed by Larry, 
Ollie, Peggy and AlecJ 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing down l.) Oh, Mr. 
Harrington, this is Mr. Gilford. (Teggy crosses 
down l. and sits. Alec stands up l.) 


46 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Sam. (Mistakes Larry for Ollie, shakes his 
hand) How do you do, Mr. Gilford- 

Larry* But you’ve - 

Sam. And how is Mrs. Gilford? 

Ollie. I’m Mr. Gilford. 

Sam. Oh, you are? (To Larry.,) I’ll meet you 
in a minute. (Crosses to Ollie, they shake hands.) 

Ollie. I’m very glad to know you, Mr. Harring¬ 
ton. 

Sam. And I’m very glad to know you. And 
how’s your wife? 

Ollie. Nicely, thank you. 

Sam. That’s good. 

Mrs. Chadwick. And Mr. Crawford. 

Sam. (Turns to Larry, they shake hands) I told 
you I’d meet you in a minute. How do you do, 
Mr. Crawford? 

Larry. How are you? 

Sam. And how’s your wife? 

Larry. No wife. 

Sam. That’s good —er— that’s too bad. 

Ollie. (To Sam) You’ll stay to lunch, won’t 
you? 

Sam. Are you going to stay ? (Realizes his mis¬ 
take, laughs. Ollie laughs.) Oh, yes, of course. 
Yes, I’ll stay, and I’ll be very glad to get it, too. 

Ollie: Well, what shall we do until lunch time? 

Mrs. Chadwick. I’ll tell you, let’s all go over 
to the club. 

Peggy. No, I’ll tell you. You can all go over to 
the club and I’ll take Mr. Harrington and show him 
over the place. 

Sam. All right. 

Larr^. No, I’ll tell you. Now we’ll all get on 
a horse- * 

Sam. Have you got one big enough ? 

Larry. (All laugh) Well, I mean, everyone get 
on his own horse- 






THE HOTTENTOT 


47 


Sam. No, they won’t, I mean I won’t. You can 
all get ou your horses and go over and attend to 
what you have to do about the race tomorrow, and 
I’ll wait here until you come back, because I haven’t 
got any horse. 

Larry. Oh, that’s all right, I’ll get you a horse. 
We’ve got horses to burn. 

Sam. That’s the first sensible thing I’ve heard 
about a horse since I’ve been here. (All laugh. Sam 
crosses to R.J 

Mrs. Chadwick. Well, if you’ll all pardon me, 
I’ll go and find May. (She exits up l.) 

Sam. May? Is that a horse? 

Ollie. A horse? (All laugh.) Peggy, did you 
hear that? (They continue to laugh.) 

Sam. What did I say? 

Ollie. You asked Mrs. Chadwick if May were 
a horse. (Another hurst of laughter.) 

Sam. Well, what’s funny about that? 

Ollie. Well, I think it’s funny, May’s not a 
horse, that’s my wife. 

('Alec has come down between Sam and Larry, 
all four are standing on a line. Ollie laughs, 
slaps Larry on the back, he falls against Alec, 
slapping him, Alec falls against Sam, slapping 
him and almost knocking him over. Ollie, 
Alec and Larry exit up c. still laughing, and 
talking ad lib. Sam goes down r. rubbing his 
shoulder. Peggy rises and crosses to R., sits 
l. of table.) 

Sam. rThey liked that one, didn’t they? 

Peggy. ,' Yes. 

Sam. (Feeling his shoulder) That’s the last one 
I’ll tell them. (Sits R. of table, same business with 
leg as before.) Now that we’re alone, Miss Fair¬ 
fax, will you tell me, please, something about the 


48 THE HOTTENTOT 

race tomorrow. I mean what are the conditions? 

Peggy. Oh, it’s a sort of go-as-you-please affair. 

Sam. I was going to do that anyway. I mean, 
what are the rules? 

Peggy. Well, there really aren’t any rules, any¬ 
one that lives here can enter a horse. 

Sam. Well, that’s too bad, isn’t it? Then I can’t 
ride tomorrow, you see, if it’s only for people who 
live here, that let’s me out. I don’t live here. 

Peggy. Oh, that only applies to the horses. 

Sam. Oh, any horse that lives here. 

Peggy. (Laughs) No, I mean anybody can ride. 

Sam. They can, eh? 

Peggy. Yes. Now tell me. How will you ride 
Bountiful tomorrow? 

Sam. How will I ride your horse in the race to¬ 
morrow? Well, I don’t know, I haven’t had very 
much time to arrange anything, you see, I haven’t 
met your horse—er—seen your horse yet. Just 
speaking offhand I should think the best thing for 
me to do would be to let Bountiful get out in front 
if she can, and try and stick on as long as pos¬ 
sible. 

Peggy. Stick on ? 

Sam. Stay there, I mean. Let her get out in front 
and stay there. 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. No? 

Peggy. No. Boutiful’s very high-strung, she’ll 
be terribly nervous at the start. 

Sam. She will, eh? 

Peggy. Yes. 

Sam. She’ll have company, I’ll tell you that. 

Peggy. If you let her go to the front too soon 
she might tire herself out. 

Sam. You see, there’s another thing. There are 
so many things to think of besides staying on. I 
don’t know; you know so much more about youi: 


THE HOTTENTOT 


40 

horse than I do- What is your idea, how would 

you like me to handle Bountiful tomorrow? 

Peggy. Just as you rode “Mamie H” in the Bur¬ 
lingame Steeplechase. 

Sam. The way I rode that one? Yes, that would 
be all right. 

Peggy. That must have been a wonderful race. 

Sam. Oh, yes. 

Peggy. I’ve thought of it so often, and I’ve read 
every account of it. McIntyre’s description was so 
vivid I can close my eyes and see the race. I know 
every word of it. 

Sam. You do, eh? 

Peggy. Yes, listen. “After a long delay at the 
post a terrific yell went up, “They’re off!” Everyone 
was eagerly watching Harrington on the favorite, 
you were trailing along in fourth place. “Watch 
Harrington,” the crowd shouted, “he’ll walk in.” 
(Sam takes other meaning, nods his head.) Then 
a hush came over the spectators, the horses were 
nearing the first jump, everyone in the huge crowd 
held his breath. Now they go, everyone of the ten 
are over the first. The crowd again breaks loose, 
“Look at Harrington, he’s third now.” 

Sam. I’m gaining. 

Peggy. Over the third jump, the people are wild; 
they shout again “Harrington’s gaining.” Look! 
He’s second, good boy Harrington. Over the fourth, 
fifth, sixth, Harrington’s steadily gaining. Look, 
he’s almost up to the leader. 

Sam. (Beginning to he excited) Come on, you 
Sand-dab! 

Peggy Now they’re at the dangerous jump next 
to the last, each jockey struggling for the lead. Sud¬ 
denly a groan from thousands of throats- 

Sam. I fell? 

Peggy. Yes. 

Sam. (Rises in disgust, goes x.) I knew it. 



50 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Peggy. But you get up! 

Sam. Yes? 

Peggy. You catch your horse. 

Sam. (Comes back, sits) Yes. 

Peggy. You vault lightly into the saddle. 

Sam. Well, I’m game, anyhow. 

Peggy. Thunders of applause, and yells of 
“Bravo!” 

Sam. Come on, Sam. (Slaps his leg, striking 
his sore thumb, same business.) 

Peggy. You commence to gain, you're sixth, fifth, 
come on you Harrington, you’re fourth, and you’re 
nearing the last jump. There they go, all over safely, 
and Harrington’s third. Watch, he’s gaining at every 
step in the stretch. 

Sam. Where am I now? 

Peggy. Second, and coming strong. 

Sam. God, what a race! 

Peggy. You’re up with the leader, you’re neck 
and neck, you’re riding like a demon, inch by inch 
you gain —you go to the whip, you shoot to the 
front, and you win by half a- 

Sam. Mile. 

Peggy. No, length. 

Sam. I don’t care, so long as I won it. (Turns 
and starts to ring tap-bell. Rings it until - ) 


CURTAIN 




The Hottentot” 2 nd Act 



























































































, 











































* 







i, 


. 

«*.(■>• --- • - • ' .... 












ACT II 


Scene: The same as Act I. 

Evening . 

Before the curtain rises, Peggy, Ollie and 
Alec are heard talking off stage l. 

Peggy. I think you’ll find out that May is right. 

Ollie. Maybe she is, but she never has been 
yet—about Bridge, I mean. 

Alec. Well, she hasn’t been playing very long. 

Ollie. No, only about twelve years, that’s all. 

(The curtain rises. May is discovered sitting l. of 
table reading a book on Bridge. Celise enters 
up R., crosses and exits up the stairs. Alec en¬ 
ters up L.) 

Alec. (Crossing to MayJ Well, I’m going to 
have a look at that book. 


(Dialogue on Stage ) 
Alec. Pardon me, 
May, may I see that book 
a minute, please? 

May. Certainly. 

(Gives Alec the 
book.) 


(Dialogue off Stage) 
Ollie. All right, take 
a look at it, take a good 
look at it. That’s the 
way I learned the game. 
Read the book, remember 
the book and you’ll know 
how to play Bridge— 
that’s all there is to it. 


("Alec takes book from May, crosses R. and sits on 
5i 


52 


THE HOTTENTOT 


back of divan reading. Dialogue off stage con¬ 
tinues.) 

Peggy. Well, Ollie, it wouldn’t do you any harm 
to look in the book once in a while. 

Ollie. I have looked in the book. 

Peggy. Then why don’t you remember what you 
read? 

Ollie. I always do remember, that’s just it. 

Alec. (Closes the book) Yes, I was right about 
that play. ( Ollie enters up l. followed by Peggy. J 

Ollie. No, no, Peggy. No matter what you say, 
the book says you must return your partner’s lead. 

Peggy. Well, I played all right when I played 
with Mr. Harrington. 

Ollie. With Mr. Harrington, yes. You never 
played a hand, did you? 

Peggy. No, I didn’t. 

Ollie. No, he always took the bid away from 
you. Mr. Harrington is an excellent player, I don’t 
know what he must think of us. 

Alec. Oh, Harrington thinks we’re all right. 

Ollie. Yes ? 

Alec. Yes, he said he’d played Bridge all over 
the world, and he’d never seen such playing. 

Peggy. Well, I’m not going to play another rub¬ 
ber until Mr. Harrington gets back. 

(She crosses l. to cabinet and stands looking at 
trophy cup. Ollie goes down l. and sits. 
Swift enters from outside door carrying sev¬ 
eral dressmaker’s boxes , hat boxes, etc. He 
is very nervous, crosses to c. and drops one of 
the boxes, as he picks it up he drops another.) 

May. Swift, what’s the matter. You aren’t ill? 

Swift. No, mam; just a bit nervous, mam 
(Drops another bundle.) 


THE HOTTENTOT 


S3 

Ollie. Where have you been for the last hour and 
a half? 

Swift. (Nervously) Sir? 

Ollie. Don’t you know you shouldn’t leave the 
house with a dinner on ? 

Swift. A what on? Oh, a dinner on, yes, sir; 
well, you see, a friend of mine was very sick— er— 
ill; I mean his wife didn’t feel well- 

Ollie. What are you talking about? 

May. (Sharply) Ollie! (Very sweetly, to 

Swift J Swift, who are those packages for? 

Swift. They’re for Mrs. Chadwick, mam. 

May. Put them in her room, Swift, please. 

Swift. Yes, mam. There’s a lot more in the 
car, mam, a lot more. f Celise enters down the 
stairs, sees Swift with the boxes, laughs, and crosses 
to c.) What are you laughing at, this is your work 
I’m doing. 

Celise. No, it is not. 

Swift. Yes, it is. I’m no errand boy for Mrs. 
Chadwick. 

Celise. And I am engaged here as Mrs. Gil¬ 
ford’s maid. 

Swift. And I’m engaged as butler; what do you 
suppose the union would say if they saw me- 

Ollie. That will do. 

Swift. Yes, sir, but Celise ought to- 

Ollie. That will do! (Jumps to his feet.) 

Swift. Yes, sir, that will do. (Takes boxes and 
exits up the stairs, talking ad lib.) 

Ollie. Yes, it will do, I’m not going to have- 

Celise. Vielle pomme fritte! O mon Dieux, I 
never see such a man- 

Ollie. And you too, Frenchie, I’m not going to 

allow - f Celise exits up r. talking ad lib in 

French. May rises and crosses up c. to Ollie.) 

May. Now listen, Ollie, you must allow me to at- 






THE HOTTENTOT 


54 

tend to the servants. Do you want them to leave, 
and the house full of guests? 

Alec. Now don’t you two start quarreling. 

Ollie. No, I don’t want the servants to leave, 
but I’m not going to allow them to run my house. 

Peggy. (Goes down l. of settee, and sits with 
hack to audience) But, Ollie, you have to allow 
them nowadays. 

Ollie. If I allow the servants to run the house I 
may as well sell it, and go board. 

Peggy. Keep quiet, Ollie. 

Ollie. I won’t keep quiet. 

("Swift enters down the stairs. Loud explosion 
off stage. He is startled and tries to exit 
through small window up r.c. Gets tangled up 
in the curtains.) 

Swift. What was that? 

Ollie. They’re blasting on the course. 

Swift. Thank you. 

Ollie. You’re welcome! 

("Swift exits up r .) 

May. Ollie, will you please let the servants alone? 

Ollie. No, I won’t! 

Alec. Sh! Ollie. 

Ollie. I won’t “Sh, Ollie”! ("Larry enters up l. 
with Bridge score. Crosses to OllieJ 

Larry. (Handing him the Bridge score) Here’s 
something that will put you in a better humor, the 
Bridge score; you’re the only loser. ( Ollie sits up 
c. Alec crosses to him and they look over the score 
together. Larry crosses down left to Peggy and 
sits.) Peggy, are you really going to let Mr. Har¬ 
rington ride Bountiful tomorrow? 

Peggy. Yes. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


55 

Larry. Why, because he made a grandstand play 
for the ladies by jumping a stone wall? 

Peggy. That had nothing to do with it. 

Larry. So you’re going to turn me down for an 
outsider? (Teggy doesn't answer.) All right, but 
don’t blame me if your horse doesn’t win. (Rises 
and crosses down extreme R.J 

Peggy. If Mr. Harrington rides Bountiful I will 
win. 

Alec. Well, your horse ought to win, Mr. Har¬ 
rington’s a great rider. (Comes down c.) 

Larry\ How do you know he’s such a great rider, 
did he tell you? 

Alec. No. Mrs. Chadwick, and my groom, Per¬ 
kins. 

Ollie. (Rises and conies down r. of Alec,) Per¬ 
kins? 

Alec. Yes. Showed me a copy of a sporting 
paper with a glowing account of a steeplechase, won 
by the best, and gamest, gentleman rider in America 
—Mr. S. Harrington. 

Peggy. Why, I knew that. 

Alec. Yes, of course you knew it. That’s why 
you got him to ride Bountiful tomorrow, instead of 
the Hottentot. And Carol knows it and thinks she’s 
putting something over on us all. 

Ollie. Do you think she really knows? 

Alec. Why, of course she knows, but I was on 
to Harrihgton the minute Perkins told me how he 
handled the Hottentot this morning. I tried to draw 
him out a while ago, and he fell for it like a child. 

Larry. How do you mean? 

Alec. Well, I told him how disappointed I was 
not having him on the Hottentot tomorrow, as I 
knew with a good rider he’d walk in. Then I added, 
but as you won’t ride him I’ll have to get someone 
else. 

Ollie. What did he say to that? 


56 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Alec. He asked me if I wanted to sell the Hot¬ 
tentot, and how much Fd take for him. I told him 
two thousand dollars, and he bought him. 

Peggy. (Rises and crosses to Alec,) Bought the 
Hottentot ? 

Alec. Yes. 

Peggy. Why ? 

Alec. Well, he said as your heart was set on 
winning the race tomorrow, and he knew the Hot¬ 
tentot was the only horse in the race that could 
beat vours—rather than have someone else ride the 
Hottentot, he bought him. 

Ollie. He doesn’t know a thing, does he? 

('Peggy goes down l. and sits. Alec goes up l., 
sees Mrs. Chadwick coming down the stairs.) 

Alec. Sh! Here’s Carol, not a word to her. (He 
goes up c. and stands looking out of window.) 
All. No. 

('Ollie crosses down and sits l. of table, writing in 
betting book. Mrs. Chadwick enters down the 
stairs.) 

Mrs. Chawdick, Hello, everybody. (No one 
ansivers , after a pause.) Well, was it a large funeral ? 
(All smile, but no one answers, she comes down c.) 
Well, why aren’t you playing Bridge? 

Peggy. I’m waiting for Mr. Harrington to get 
back. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh, Sam. 

Larry. Yes, Sam. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes, your friend. 

Larry. Oh, no, not mine. 

Peggy. (Rises and crosses to Mrs. Chadwick,) 
Carol. 

Mrs. Chadwick. What is it, precious? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


57 

Peggy. Who do you think will win the race to¬ 
morrow ? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Why- 

Larry. She thinks my mount’s a cinch. Don’t 
you? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes. 

Alec. Oh, you do? 

Ollie. (Rises and goes to her) Well, if you 
fancy Larry’s mount I’ll bet you a thousand dol¬ 
lars— 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh, I just fancy his mount, 
I’m not betting yet. (Alt exchange significant 
glances. Peggy exits up the stairs.) Well, are we 
going to play Bridge? 

All. Yes. Certainly, etc., etc. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Come on, boys. (She exits up 
l., followed by Alec.,) 

Ollie. I’ll be with you in a moment. 

("Larry crosses, preparing to follow the others. Per¬ 
kins enters up R.J 

Perkins. Pardon me, Mr. Crawford. 

Larry. Yes ? 

Perkins. Your trainer wishes to see you. 

Larry. McKesson ? 

Perkins. Yes, sir. 

Larry. Tell him to wait, I’ll see him in just a 
minute. 

Perkins. Yes, sir. (Starts to go.) 

Ollie. Oh, Perkins. How’s everything over at 
the stable? 

Perkins. Oh, fine, sir. Everything’s fine. 

Ollie. And Bountiful, is she fit and well? 

Perkins. Fit, and ready to run the race of her 
life, sir. And if anyone should want me I’ll be over 
at the stable, sir. (He exits up R.) 



THE HOTTENTOT 


58 


Ollie. Larry, I supppose you’re going to ride 
your own horse, Cannon Ball? 

Larry. Yes, and he’s going to win, too. 

Ollie. I’ll bet you a thousand Harrington beats 
you. 

Larry. Harrington? You’re on. (Takes note¬ 
book from pocket and starts to enter bet.) That’s 
a thousand, eh? 

Ollie. Yes. 

Sam. (Enters through window up c. and crosses 
down between Ollie and Larry J Well, here I am. 
(Loud explosion off stage. Sam is startled , takes 
his hat off and starts to hand it to Ollie and then 
to Larry, realizes his mistake and places it on divan 
down r. Ollie crosses down r. and sits r. of table. 
Sam crosses l. to Larry. ) I didn’t disturb you, did 
I, Mr. Crawford? 

Larry. Not at all. (Still writing in book.) I’m 
just entering a bet of a thousand dollars that I beat 
you tomorrow, and I wish it was with you. 

Sam. You can have a bet with me. 

Larry. How much ? 

Sam. I’ll bet you five thousand dollars. 

Larry. Five thousand ? 

Sam. Yes. I’ll bet you five thousand dollars my 
horse comes in alone. (Crosses R. to table and takes 
cigarette from humidor.) 

Larry. Comes in alone? 

Sam. Yes, all by himself. (Lights cigarette.) 

Larry. Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Yes. 

Larry. You don’t want to make that five thousand 
— ten? 

Sam. Yes, that’s why I bet the five. (Sits l. of 
table.) 

Ollie. Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Yes, sir? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


59 

Ollie. Alec tells me you’ve just bought the Hot¬ 
tentot. 

Sam. Yes, I bought him. 

Ollie. Are you going to break him yourself? 

Sam. Yes, I’m going to break him—I’m going 
to start with his front legs. 

Ollie. Well, Larry, did you find the course in 
pretty good condition? 

Larry. Yes, but that gang of yours will have to 
work all night to get the water jump in shape. 

Sam. (Rises and crosses to Larry) Isn’t the 
water jump in shape? 

Larry. Not yet. 

Sam. Well, that’s too bad. Maybe if they don’t 
get it in shape by tomorrow they’ll have to post¬ 
pone the race—till next year. You understand what 
I mean, they may not have time to finish it. 

Ollie. Oh, they’ll finish it, they’re blasting on it 
now. 

Sam. That ought to finish it. (Crosses back r. 
and sits. To Ollie.) As I’m to ride in the race 
tomorrow, don’t you think you ought to tell me 
something about this track? 

Ollie. Why, er- 

Larry. Track? It isn’t a track, it’s a point to 
point. 

Sam. Point to point? Well, they’ve changed it 
then, Miss Fairfax told me this morning it was a 
steeplechase. 

Larry, Well, it is. 

Sam. Oh, a point to—er steeplechase. How far 
is it ? 

Ollie. About three miles. 

Sam. From here? 

Larry. No, that’s the length of the course. Three 
miles and twelve jumps. 

Sam. Twelve? Three miles and twelve jumps. 
I don’t know yet how long it is. 



6o 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Larry. Yes, didn’t you run over the course yet? 

Sam. How could I run three miles? 

Larry. Well, on a horse, I mean. 

Sam. No, I wouldn’t tire a horse out like that. 

Larry. Well, I wouldn’t care to tackle a course 
in a race without going over the ground before¬ 
hand. 

Sam. You can do what you like. I don’t care 
what you do, you can go over it as often as you 
please. I’m going to do this thing tomorrow— once . 
I’d look fine rehearsing a thing like that. 

Larry. Well, don’t you want to become familiar 
with the jumps? 

Sam. I’d like to meet them casually. I don’t want 
to get too familiar with them, no. 

Ollie. He’s kidding you, Larry. 

Larry. (To Sam,) Are you kidding me? 

Sam. Yes. 

Ollie. Mr. Harrington’s an expert, he doesn’t 
have to go over the course. 

Larry. I suppose you’re right. At that, there’s 
nothing much to bother you, a fairly stiff water jump, 
about eighteen feet. 

Sam. That’s a river. Eighteen feet? A water 
jump? Who thought of that? 

Ollie. I did, and I’m having it made larger. 

Sam. What is this thing tomorrow, a horse race 
or a boat race? Eighteen feet, that’s ridiculous. 
While we’re here now and have the time I think we 
ought to fix it up on something, a water jump, 
eighteen feet. For a lot of friends—riding for a cup. 
I’d rather chip in and get you each a cup, than take 
a chance like that—eighteen feet. (To Ollie.,) 
You thought of it, eh? 

Ollie. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Do you ride tomorrow? 

Ollie. No, I don’t. 

Sam. No, of course not. (Rises and crosses to 


THE HOTTENTOT 61 

Larry.J Mr. Crawford, where is this water 
jump? 

Larry. Why, it’s near the finish, it’s the last 
jump. 

Sam. The last jump? Oh, that’s all right then, 
the last jump won’t bother me any tomorrow. I’m 
not even worrying about the second jump. (Alec 
enters up l.) 

Alec.- Well, are you coming? 

Sam. Where? 

Alec. Wouldn’t you like a little Bridge? 

Sam. I’d love a little bridge—right over that 
water jump. (Peggy starts down the stairs.) 

Ollie. (Rises and crosses L.) Alec, if I cut you 
for partner will you please observe the rules ? (Peggy 
enters down the stairs.) And you too, Peggy. 

Peggy. .Ollie, dear, you know how I detest rules. 

Ollie. I know, but you might give me your fourth 
best once in awhile. 

Larry. (To Ollie,} Yes, and it wouldn’t do any 
harm if you’d return your partner’s lead. 

Peggy. Well, the only real Bridge player I’ve seen 
here tonight is Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Thank you very much, but I didn’t do my 
best tonight. I didn’t deal enough. 

(All laugh. Ollie and Alec exit up l. Peggy 
and Larry start to follow, she sees that Sam 
isn’t coming, turns to him.) 

Peggy. Aren’t you coming? 

Sam. Where? 

Peggy. Wouldn’t you like to play some more 
Bridge? 

Sam. I’ll play if you want to, of course, but I'd 
much rather stay here and talk. 

Peggy. ( Crossing to him) So would I. 

Sam. (Looking at Larry,) Well, that could be 


62 THE HOTTENTOT 

arranged. You see the two of us could stay here 
and talk. 

Larry. Well, pardon me! ("Peggy goes down l. 
and sits. Larry starts up l., stops, and crosses over 
rJ I think I’ll speak to my trainer, McKesson, if 
you don’t mind. 

Sam. I don’t mind. That’s up to him. 

("Larry glares at him and exits up r. Sam stands 
c. trying to gage the length of the water jump.) 

Peggy. Are you thinking of the race? 

Sam. I haven’t stopped thinking of it since you 
mentioned it this morning. Right then I was sort 
of measuring the water jump. 

Peggy. (Smiles) Shall I order coffee ? 

Sam. (Still thinking of the water jump, looks 
up quickly) Order what? 

Peggy. Coffee. 

Sam. I thought you said a coffin. (Relieved.) 
Peggy. (Laughs . Rises and crosses to table, sits 
l. of it and rings tapbell. Sam grins.) But of 
course if you’d prefer something else? 

Sam. (Goes down l. and sits) No, what you hit 
the bell for will be all right for me. 

(After a slight pause Swift enters up r. with drink 
on tray, crosses down l. to Sam. Just before 
he reaches him, and as Sam puts his hand out to 
take the drink, Peggy speaks.) 

Peggy. Coffee, Swift. 

Swift. Coffee, yes, miss. (Turns and crosses 
back r. Sam jumps to his feet and follows, trying 
to get the drink; would follow Swift off but Peggy’s 
voice stops him.) 

Peggy. Well- 

Sam. Coffee, Swift. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


63 


Swift. Yes, sir. (Exits up rJ 

Sam. (Comes down and sits r. of table) I didn’t 
think he heard you, I just wanted to tell him. 

Peggy. Well, now that you’ve asked me to stay 
here and talk, what shall we talk about, the race ? 

Sam. Yes, that’s exactly why I wanted to see 
you alone. Something’s been troubling me a lot, a 
whole lot, a sort of misunderstanding. It isn’t very 
easy to explain, still it’s got to be done. 

Peggy. Really ? 

Sam. Yes, you remember when we met this morn- 
ing, you began talking about a race out west? Well, 
I was so pleased and surprised at seeing you that 
it sort of took my breath away, and I really didn’t 
know what I was saying. 

Peggy. I was the one, you hardly said anything. 

Sam. That’s just it. 

Peggy. Was it something you said, or I said? 

Sam. It was something you thought about me. 

Peggy. Are you quite sure you know what I think 
about you? 

Sam. It’s what you will think about me. 

Peggy. Oh, you mean if you don’t win the race 
for me tomorrow. You’re afraid my horse isn’t 
good enough. 

Sam. I don’t know anything about that. 

Pegqy. You think I’m overconfident. That I’m 
counting on you to do the impossible, and you’re pre¬ 
paring to take the blame on yourself and let me down 
easy. 

Sam. Maybe I’m trying to let myself down easy. 

PfxTgy. (Rises and takes stage . Sam rises) But 
we’re going to win. I don’t want to think of any¬ 
thing else, and I don’t want you to think of anything 
else. 

Sam. There’s nothing in the world I’d like better. 
Miss Fairfax. 

Peggy. (Sits l. of table. Sam sits) Now the 


THE HOTTENTOT 


64 

first thing to do is take you over to the stable and 
show you Bountiful—after we have our coffee. 
Aren’t you just dying to get on her? 

Sam. Well, there’s plenty of time for that, isn’t 
there? You see, we’re here alone together, and its 
awfully nice to be here. I haven’t begun to tell you 
yet how really wonderful I think it is. 

Peggy. Thank you. (She rises. Sam rises.) I 
want to show you something. (She crosses l. to 
cabinet, gets trophy cup, crosses back and places it 
on table.) This is the trophy cup. 

Sam. (Looks into it) Ah, empty. 

Peggy. Now I want to show you my colors. 

Sam. Mike who? 

Peggy. (Laughs) My colors. (She crosses to 
cabinet, gets jockey blouse and cap, crosses back to 
Sam and hands them to him.) These are my colors. 

Sam. (Holding up blouse) Is this all there is 
of it? 

Peggy. Yes. 

Sam. Be all right for the water jump. 

Peggy. Do you like my colors? 

Sam. Very much. (Hands blouse to Peggy.J 

Peggy. What are your racing colors? 

Sam. Black and blue. ('Peggy hangs blouse over 
back of her chair.) I love this bonnet. 

Peggy. (Laughing) Bonnet. Would you mind 
trying it on? ("Sam hesitates.) Please? 

Sam. (Puts on cap, points to ribbon which hangs 
down over visor) That won’t be there, will it? I 
only want to watch one thing tomorrow. That would 
look like a tree to me tomorrow. 

Peggy. (Stands back and admires him) Just to 
see it on you gives me the most wonderful thrill. 

Sam. It gives me a chill, too. 

Peggy. (Takes cup and hands it to him) Here, 
hold this. 

Sam. Why hold it? 


.THE HOTTENTOT 65 

Peggy. I want to see how you’ll look after you’ve 
won the race. 

Sam. I know what you mean. (Pointing to cup.) 
This will be filled with lilies. 

Peggy. I can see your picture in the papers. 

Sam. Waiting to be identified. (He strikes a 
pose.) If you want it for a picture, Miss Fairfax, 
I’ve got a very good idea, if you don’t mind my sug¬ 
gesting it. You see I could have it taken more like 

a jockey - (Poses.) And if they could snap it 

quickly I’ve got a wonderful idea. 

Peggy. What is it? 

Sam. Of course, they’d have to snap it like that. 
(Starts to snap his fingers, his thumb is still sore and 
he winces with pain.) You see, I could be looking 
back at the other jockeys—disdainfully. (He strikes 
another pose, looks over his right shoulder, and 
makes a face.) 

Peggy. I can hear the crowds yelling, I can see 
them carrying you in! 

Sam. Isn’t that funny, that’s just what I was 
thinking of. (Loud explosion off stage . Sam starts 
and almost drops the trophy cup.) 

Peggy. (After a slight pause) Mr. Harrington, 
if you’ll only win that cup for me I’d give any¬ 
thing. 

Sam. Anything? 

Peggy. Anything. 

Sam. Well, that’s enough to make a fellow feel 
like trying, anyway. 

("Swift enters up r. with coffee service on tray, 
crosses down r. of table and places tray on 
down stage end of table.) 

Swift. Is there anything more, Miss Fairfax? 
(Catches sight of Sam, who has struck another pose 
with trophy cup. Is greatly perturbed and upset — 



66 


THE HOTTENTOT 


half-crying.) Oh! Mr. Harrington! Oh—Oh! 

(Runs off up rJ 

Sam. There’s something wrong with Swift. 

Peggy. Yes. (She sits and starts to arrange 
coffee things.) 

Sam. I’d better take my hat off while we have 
coffee. (Removes cap and places it on table. Sits. 
Has long bus. of trying to place trophy cup where 
it will not be in his way. Finally lays it in his lap, 
it starts to roll off on the floor, he catches it.) Do 
you mind if I put this down for a minute? 

Peggy. No. (Sam places cup on the floor beside 
his chair.) Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. What? 

Peggy. (Holding up lump of sugar, with tongs) 
Sugar? 

Sam. I know it is. 

(Peggy laughs, puts sugar in his cup and passes it 
to him. Takes her own cup, takes serviette 
from tray, opens it and places it in her lap, sits 
looking front and stiring coffee. Sam watches 
her, puts his cup on table and picks up serviette, 
opens it, seees how small it is, picks up sugar 
bowl, looking for the rest of it. He is sitting 
with legs apart and when he places it in his lap 
it falls through to the floor, he picks it up, puts 
it on his knee, then on his arm, and finally tucks 
it in his vest. Takes up cup and sits stirring 
coffee. Peggy takes spoon from cup, sips cof¬ 
fee. Sam does the same, shows he doesn't like 
it and starts to pour it into trophy cup. Peggy 
looks up and catches him.) 

Peggy. What’s the matter, isn’t it sweet enough? 

Sam. Oh, yes, it’s sweet enough, I was just going 
to pour it back and forth to cool it off. (After a 
pause, during zvhich both sit looking front and sip- 


THE HOTTENTOT 


67 

ping coffee.) The last time I had coffee like this I 
was at a friend’s house—we had a very nice dinner— 
after dinner he rang the bell. The butler came in; 
my friend whispered to him. I knew what he was 
whispering, but I didn’t want to say anything. He 
said, “Now get two of those and get back as soon 
as you can.” The butler said, “Sure, Mike”—er— 
“Yes, sir.” He went out, and pretty soon he returned 
with a tray that had two glasses on it, two of those 
long, thin-stemmed glasses—they’re rather out of 
date now—liquer glasses. Did I say it right, liquer ? 

. Peggy. Yes. 

Sam. Filled with brandy —and without asking 
whether I cared for it or not he deliberately poured 
it right in my coffee. I drank it of course, to be 
polite, but I like it much better without the coffee— 
er, brandy. 

Peggy. (Passing cigarette humidor to Sam.,) 
You may smoke, if you like. 

Sam. Thank you. (Puts cup on table, takes 
cigarette and lights it, picks up cup and starts to 
drink, the cigarette still in his mouth. Holds cig¬ 
arette in his left hand and again tries to drink, al¬ 
most burns his face, takes cigarette in his right hand, 
sips coffee.) I’m glad I got rid of that before I 
started to smoke. (Points to trophy cup on floor. 
Sips coffee, puts cup back on table, folds serviette 
and puts it on tray.) I’m going to rest now. (With¬ 
out thinking he puts his ashes in the trophy cup, 
looks at Peggy quickly to see if she has seen it. 
She puts her cup and serviette on table. A pause, 
during which both sit looking front.) Miss Fairfax, 
what are you thinking of? 

Peggy. I was thinking of my horse. What are 
you thinking of? 

Sam. I was thinking of you. I was wondering 
if you realize how much more interesting, and 
wonderful, you are, than any other horse—er—I 


68 


THE HOTTENTOT 


mean - (Loud explosion off stage. Sam starts, 

almost knocks over the trophy cup which stands at 
his feet. Rises, picks it up and places it on divan R.) 
You don’t mind if I put this over here, do 
you? 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. I’ll break it, sure. (Comes hack and sits.) 
They don’t keep that up during the race, do they? 

Peggy. No. 

Sam. What does it all amount to anyway, Miss 
Fairfax, all that we’ve been talking about—horses— 
steeplechases—water jumps—trophy cups? I mean, 
what does it all amount to as compared to the real 
thing? Now if I liked a girl very much, and she 
didn’t go in for racing, didn’t care about horses, why 
I wouldn’t think any the less of her. 

Peggy. Of course not. 

Sam. No. Why should I? On the other hand, 
take you, for instance. Suppose you had met a man 
and you rather liked him, and he told you that he 
didn’t care about horses—was mad at them—hated 
them—couldn’t even get on a horse without being 
scared to death. That wouldn’t make any differ¬ 
ence with you, would it? 

Peggy. Yes. 

Sam. Yes, you see it would. 

Peggy. With nothing in common to be interested 

in, and do together, and all that we love most- 

No, it wouldn’t be the same at all with that kind of 
a man. Afraid to get on a horse. (Laughs. Sam 
gives a false laugh.) No, I simply wouldn’t have 
any use for him. 

Sam. That’s what I thought. But suppose it 
happened to be a man who’d met with a terrible 
accident ? 

Peggy. Lost his nerve, you mean, after a bad 
fall? 

Sam. Yes. 



THE HOTTENTOT 69 

Peggy. But if he were the right sort, he’d never 
give up riding. 

Sam. He might not care enough about it. 

Peggy. But you would, and so would I. Imagine 
going through life without horses? 

Sam. I can imagine it, yes. 

Peggy. Afraid of them? 

Sam. ^ I knew a case like that once, very much 
like that, someone I was very, very fond of, too. It 
was in California, about six years ago, a man who’d 
been brought up with horses, a very good rider, 
too. 

Peggy. Well, what happened? 

Sam. Well, one day he was riding along a road, 
when suddenly a horse shot by with a child on its 
back, the horse was running away, and the man 
almost died because he knew that at the end of that 
road was a pretty deep gully, a pretty bad fall. 
Well, he dug his spurs in of course and went after 
the horse, just managed to reach it, lifted the child 
out of the saddle and dropped her on the ground. 
He only had a minute to stop his own horse, and as 
he put his full strength on the reins—snap, some¬ 
thing gave way, and over he went. All he could re¬ 
member after that was, brown rocks, branches, 
horse’s hoofs, blue sky, and then nothing. 

Peggy. He wasn’t killed? 

Sam. No, by some miracle, he wasn’t, but after 
he recovered he had no more use for horses. Didn’t 
care to go near them, couldn’t bear the sight of a 
horse, just completely lost his nerve. 

Peggy. That was a terrible experience, of course, 
but he ought never let it get the best of him. (Slight 
pause.) He ought to jump right on a horse, any 
horse, every horse, and keep on doing it until he got 
his nerve back again. 

Sam. Keep jumping on a horse until he got his 
nerve back again? 


70 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Peggy. Yes. (After a pause.) Will you hand me 
that cup, please? 

Sam. Certainly. (Hands her his coffee cup.) 

Peggy. (Laughs) No, I mean the trophy cup. 

Sam. Why didn’t you say, “the one without the 
saucer.” (Rises, goes to divan and gets cup, hands 
it to Peggy. ) 

Peggy. (Rising and taking cup) Thank you. 
(Starts to cross l. to replace cup on cabinet.) 

Sam. Oh, Miss Fairfax. 

Peggy. (Stops and turns to him) Yes, Mr. Har¬ 
rington? 

Sam. (Crossing to her) Will you do me a very 
great favor, Miss Fairfax? 

Peggy. Yes, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. And you won’t feel offended, Miss Fair¬ 
fax? 

Peggy. No, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Well, will you please call me Sam, Miss 
Fairfax ? 

Peggy. Yes, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Thank you, Miss Fairfax. 

( Peggy turns, goes to cabinet and replaces trophy 
cup, stands looking at it for a moment. Sam 
crosses up c. to window and stands looking out. 
Peggy starts to exit up l.. as she reaches the 
door she stops, thinks a moment, then turns 
to Sam.J 

Peggy. Oh, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. (Crossing to her) Yes, Miss Fairfax? 

Peggy. I’ll teil you what I will do, Mr. Har¬ 
rington. 

Sam. What, Miss Fairfax? 

Peggy. If you’ll win that cup for me, I’ll call you 
Sam, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Will you, Miss Fairfax? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


7 1 


Peggy. Yes, Sam. 

Sam. Thank you, Peggy. 

(She turns and exits quickly, up l. After a slight 
pause Sam goes to cabinet and stands looking 
at trophy cup. Larry enters up c., sees Sam, 
and stands watching him. As Sam starts to 
pick up the cup Larry speaks.) 

Larry. Well, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. (Startled and almost dropping the cup) 
I wasn’t going to take it. (Crossing to Larry.) 
I just wanted to see how heavy it was. 

Peggy. (Off stage) Mr. Harrington! (Sam 
looks, but doesn't answer.) Sam! 

Sam. (Grins at Larry, crosses up l., pauses in 
doorway and turns to him) Did you hear that? 
Sam? Cut down from Sammy. (Exits up l.) 

Larry. (Stands for a moment looking at news¬ 
paper which he carries, crosses up l. and calls off) 
Oh, Carol! 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Off stage) Yes, Larry? 
Larry. Will you step here just a minute, please? 
Mrs. Chadwick. (Off stage) Certainly. Will 
you take my hand a minute, please? 

Peggy. (Off stage) Surely. 

(Mrs. Chadwick enters up l.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing c. to LarryJ What 
is it, Larry? 

Larry. You’ve known this Harrington for some 
time, haven’t you? 

Mrs. Chadwick. For years and years. Why? 
Larry. You know all about him? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Why, certainly. 

Larry. Then why didn’t you tip me off to the 
truth about him? 


72 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Mrs. Chadwick. In what way? 

Larry. Why didn’t you tell me he was such a 
wonderful rider ? 

Mrs. Chadwick. A wonderful rider? 

Larry. Yes, just listen to this. (Reads from 
paper. Mrs. Chadwick looks over his shoulder.) 
“Another triumph for Mr. S. Harrington, proving 
beyond question that he is America’s greatest, and 
gamest, gentleman rider.” 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Laughing) Oh, Larry. 

Larry. Why the laugh? 

Mrs. Chadwick. That isn’t my Sam Harring¬ 
ton; that’s another Sam Harrington. 

Larry. Now don’t stall any more, he’s the Har¬ 
rington this paper referes to, and you know it. 

Mrs. Chadwick.. Nonsense, Larry. I’d love to 
tell you the truth about Sam Harrington, if only to 
let you see how ridiculous you are. 

Larry. You’d love to, but you won’t. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Larry, will you give me your 
word you won’t tell a soul, if I tell you the truth 
about him? 

Larry. Yes. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Sam Harrington didn’t come 
here to ride, he came because he’s in love with 
Peggy. 

Larry. What ? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes, Sam never rode a race 
out west, or anywhere else. 

Larry. You don’t expect me to believe any such 
stuff as that? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Sam hasn’t been on a horse in 
years, he told me so himself. 

Larry. Then how about jumping the wall with 
the Hottentot? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Jumping the wall? 

Larry. Yes. 

Mrs. Chadwick. He was thrown over the wall. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


73 


Larry. What ? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes, the Hottentot ran away 
with him and threw him over the wall. 

Larry. Threw him over, are you sure of that? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Certainly. 

Larry. (Laughing) Oh, Lord, that’s too good 
to be true. 

Mrs. Chadwick. But it is true. I suppose it 
was poisonous of me to tell. 

Larry. Carol, you’re positive of that? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Positive, that’s why I don’t 
want him to ride tomorrow, I’m afraid he might get 
hurt'. 

Larry. No, let him ride, let him ride. Why, a 
little spill on the soft turf, or in the water, wouldn’t 
hurt anyone. Just fun for the crowd. So he’s in 
love with Peggy, eh? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Yes. 

Larry. And he doesn’t know anything about 
races? 

Mrs. Chadwick. No. 

Larry. Well, I’ll teach him something tomorrow 
that he’ll never forget. (Laughs.) Just watch that 
race tomorrow, that's all, just watch. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Watch? I may not even see 
the race. 

Larry. Why not ? 

Mrs. Chadwick. I’ve got to go to New York. 

Larry. What for ? 

Mrs. Chadwick. To meet Reggie Townsend, 
he’s coming all the way from the Philippines, just to 
see me. (Tarry crosses up c. Mrs. Chadwick. 
follows.) Larry, you did give me your word you 
wouldn’t say anything about it? 

Larry. Certainly, I gave you my word. I won’t 
say anything about it, but, oh! I’ll think a lot. (Exits 
up c. laughing.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Calling after him) Now, 


74 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Larry, please, you promised. (Stands in window 
looking after him. Sam enters up h.) 

Sam. (Turns in doorway and speaks off stage) 
Why, yes, certainly, Miss Fairfax, lots of decks 
have five aces. (Starts to measure length of water 
jump.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. Now listen, Sam, I want you 
to give up this poisonous idea and come right back 
to New York with me tonight. 

Sam. You mean about racing tomorrow? I can’t 
do that, I’ve given my word of honor to Miss Fair¬ 
fax. 

Mrs. Chadwick. You don’t mean to tell me 
you’re going to be idiot enough to try and ride to¬ 
morrow ? 

Sam. I didn’t say anything about being an idiot, 
but Fm going to try and ride tomorrow, yes. 

Mrs. Chadwick. All right. (Crosses up l. to 
doorway, turns.) But, remember, if anything hap¬ 
pens it will be on your own head. (She exits up L.) 

Sam. I know where it will be, I know where it 
will be. (Starts to measure from end of settee 
down l. When he, gets to about nine feet Swift 
enters up R.) 

Swift. Mr. Harrington, what’s that? 

Sam. That’s nine, and I’ve got to go nine more 
and take a horse with me, over a lot of water and 
mud and everything. 

Swift. Oh, you mean the water jump? 

Sam. The water jump, yes. It’s eighteen feet, 
and they’re making it larger. Why, I don’t know. 
("Swift goes to table and starts picking up coffee 
things, he is very nervous, his hand trembles and 
he drops cup. Sam is still measuring—it startles 
him.) What’s the matter with you? 

Swift. Lbeg your pardon, sir. (Replaces cups on 
tray, picks up tray, his hand trembles and hits tap- 
bell with tray, ringing it.) 


THE HOTTENTOT 


75 

Sam. Don’t do that, you’ll bring yourself a drink. 

Swift. No, I won’t, sir; I’m too nervous. 

Sam. You’re too nervous? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. If I wasn’t frightened I’d laugh at that. 
What are you nervous about? You don’t have to 
ride tomorrow. 

Swift. No, sir. 

Sam. You’re nervous because I’m going to ride? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. (Crosses down l.) Well, I can be nervous 
enough without your help. 

Swift. (Puts dozvn tray and crosses c.) Well, 
I thought you might need a little, Mr. Harrington, 
and I’ve undertaken to help you out. 

Sam. What do you mean? 

Swift. When I saw you on that horse from the 
Academy I knew you were in no condition to ride 
a steeplechase. 

Sam. You followed me? 

Swift. Yes, sir, I did, and I could see that you 
might be killed in a steeplechase. And Mr. Har¬ 
rington ,-1 got thinking of my poor brother Sam—I 
could see him lying there on the ground, cold, and— 

Sam. Shut up, shut up! 

Swift. —and I just couldn’t bear it. 

Sam, You couldn’t bear it? 

Swift. No, sir, that’s why I did what I’ve done. 

Sam. What did you “did what you’ve done”; 
what do you mean? 

Swift. I’ve got it fixed so you won’t have to ride 
tomorrow. 

Sam. What do you mean, Swift; how did you 
fix it? 

Swifj. I’ve hidden Bountiful. 

Sam. Hidden Bountiful? Where? 

Swift. Where they’ll never find her? 

Sam. Where they’ll never find her? 


76 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Swift. Where they’ll never find her until after 
the race is over, anyway. 

Sam. How do you know? 

Swift. Because, I took her out of her own stable, 
and hid her in her winter stable. 

Sam. How do you know they won’t find her in 
the winter stable? 

Swift. Because they never go there at this time 
of the year. 

Sam. Are you sure? 

Swift. Positive. 

Sam. No harm can come to her ? She won’t catch 
cold in the winter stable? 

Swift. No, no, sir. 

Sam. I wouldn’t have anything happen to Boun¬ 
tiful, for all the money in the world. 

Swift. No, sir. She’ll be just as comfortable as 
though she was in a feather bed. 

Sam. She’ll be fed properly? 

Swift. There’s plenty of feed there, oats, and 
hay, and- 

Sam. Any apples? 

Swift. Yes, a barrel of apples, and plenty of 
fresh water. 

Sam. Where she can get at it? 

Swift. I put it right handy, where she can reach 
it. 

Sam. She’s intelligent, she’ll know enough to 

reach over and- (Cranes his neck as a horse 

would do.) 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Are you sure that nobody saw you? 

Swift. No, sir. 

Sam. No, sir? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Well, make up your mind now, which is it? 

Swift. I mean, yes, sir, nobody saw me. Not 
even Perkins. 




THE HOTTENTOT 


77 


Sam. Perkins? 

Swift. Yes, Perkins, he's the groom. 

Sam. He’s Mr. Fairfax’s groom. 

Swift. Yes, sir, he takes care of Bountiful. 

Sam. He does? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Well, don’t you suppose he’ll find out? 

Swift. I hope not. 

Sam. You hope not? Of course you hope not— 
so do I hope not. If he does find it out what will 
he do? I suppose he’ll run right over here and tell 
them. 

Swift. No, sir, he couldn’t do that, it’s too far. 
But he’d be sure to telephone. 

Sam. He would telephone, eh? 

Swift. Yes, but I think she’s perfectly safe. 1 
locked her in the stable. 

Sam. You did lock her in? 

Swift. Yes, sir; I have the key here. (Takes 
key from pocket, holds it oat to Sam.) 

Sam. (Backing away from him) Put that key 
away. 

Swift. You’d better take it, sir- 

Sam. I don’t want the key. 

Swift. It would be safer if- 

Sam. I don’t want the key! (Swift starts to 
speak:) I don’t want the key! 

Swift. Well, I don’t want it found on me. 

Sam. No. You want it found on me. 

Swift. No, but it would mean my position here 
if anyone found this out. 

Sam. You don’t suppose I’ll tell anyone, do you? 
Put that key away. (Swift sighs, pats key in his 
pocket and crosses r.) Here, Swift. (Swift pauses, 
Sam crosses to him, taking money from pocket.) 
I don’t want you to feel that I don’t appreciate what 
you’ve done, here—here’s a hundred dollars for you. 
(Holds out bill to him.) 




78 THE HOTTENTOT 

Swift. (Reaches for it) I can’t take it. (Draws 
hack hand.) 

Sam. Yes, you can; you nearly had it then. 

("Larry enters up c. and stands listening.) 

Swift. No, I can’t take it—a hundred dollars. 

Larry. A hundred dollars? ("Sam hears him.) 

Swift. It’s too much. 

Sam. (For Larry’s benefit) Too much? If the 
poor lady is sick, and everything—and going to be 
thrown out of her home, and all of her children 
thrown out after her—in this kind of weather? And 
all the trouble she’s had with her husband? ('Swift 
looks at him in blank amazement. Sam winks at 
him frantically.) You know the trouble you’ve just 
been telling me about ? (Winks at him again. Swift 
finally understands and nods his head.) Too much? 
No, it isn’t too much, and if your Spanish friend, 
Jaunita, needs any more, you send her to me. Won’t 
you? ("Swift does not answer. Sam thrusts the 
money at him.) Won't youf 

Swift. (Taking money) Yes, sir, yes, sir; I will. 
(Exits quickly up r.J 

Larry. Who is the poor lady? 

Sam. She’s a Spanish lady, an old friend of 
Swift’s. He knew her before she was Spanish— 
er—before she was- 

Larry. And she’s in trouble? 

Sam. Yes, she’s in great trouble. 

Larry. And you gave her a hundred dollars? 

Sam. Yes. 

Larry. Well, that was very nice of you. 

Sam. What was nice about it? A hundred dol¬ 
lars means nothing to me, fortunately, and, after all, 
what does it mean to her—with the prices of things 
nowadays. A hundred dollars, with ten children, 
that’s only ten dollars apiece. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


79 

Larry. (Crossing r.) I’m just crazy to get at 
this race tomorrow—it isn’t, often, you know, that 
this little community has a chance to entertain such 
a lion. 

Sam. Liar? 

Larry. Why, no, such a lion. 

Sam. Well, speak distinctly when you use a word 
like that, please. 

Larry. You know how it is in a place like this, 
where everybody’s cracked about horses. When a 
chap like you comes along, someone who can show 
us a thing or two, why we feel that we can’t do 
enough for him. 

Sam. Naturally. 

Larry. But, if a fellow blows in who can’t ride, 
nobody has any use for him. 

Sam; No. 

Larry. Ah, but you’re different, you’ve got a 
record behind you, a lot of past performances. 

Sam. What do you know about my past per¬ 
formances ? 

Larry. Why, I’ve been reading about you. 
(Holds up the paper.) And this is pretty strong. 
(Reads.) “Another triumph for Mr. S. Harrington, 
proving beyond question that he is America’s great¬ 
est, and gamest, gentleman rider.” 

Sam. Did that fool put that in? (Crosses to 
Larry and looks over his shoulder.) 

Larry. Yes. 

Sam. America’s greatest? 

Larry. Yes. 

Sam. The world's greatest, I told him to say. 

Larry. The world’s greatest? 

Sam. Yes, the whole world’s greatest rider. 

Larry. Well, I’ll be- (Throws paper down 

on table, it hits tap-bell and rings it.) 

Sam. Thank you. (Crosses down r.) Now the 
party will commence. 



8 o THE HOTTENTOT 

(Swift enters up R. with drink on tray, crosses to 
c. Sam crosses to him to take the drink.) 

Larry. (Takes drink from Swift ) Thank you. 
(Drinks, puts glass back on tray.) 

Sam. (To Swift) That was for me, wasn’t it? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Well, why didn’t you give it to me? 

Swift. I had it here, but Mr. Crawford- 

Sam. Never mind him. Get another one, and 
come around that way. (Points back of divan.) I’ll 
be down there. (Points down extreme R.) 

Swift. Yes, sir. (Exits up r.) 

(Loud explosion off stage. Sam jumps.) 

Larry. Why, that’s all right. 

Sam. Is it? You mean that noise is all right? 

Larry. Why, yes. Don’t you know what that 
is ? 

Sam. The Hottentot sneezing, isn’t it? 

Larry. No, they’re blasting on the course. 

Sam. I know, they’re blasting on the course. 

Larry. Yes, they’re enlarging the water jump. 

Sam. I know, I know, they’re enlarging the water 
jump. Everybody keeps telling me that—enlarging 
the water jump. Be quite a resort when they get 
through with it. (Crosses up c. to window, looks 
out, comes down r. of Larry.) 

Larry. What’s the matter, you seem to be a bit 
nervous ? 

Sam. I’m not nervous, but I can’t help thinking 
about that poor Spanish lady. 

Larry. Oh, yes, Jaunita. 

Sam. Jaunita McGowwan, yes. 

Larry. Well, Mr. Harrington, why don’t you 
have this poor lady bet the hundred dollars you gave 
her on your mount tomorrow? 



THE HOTTENTOT 


81 


Sam, What a silly suggestion, coming from a 
man like you, a man that knows as much about 
horses as you do. Bet a hundred dollars, possibly 
the only hundred dollars she has in the world, on 
a Steeplechase—where an accident is liable to hap¬ 
pen— 

Larry. Oh, no, no accident, not with you. What, 
the great expert? (Crosses up l., laughing.) 

Sam. Yes, it could, an accident could happen. 

Larry. Oh, no, not with you. (He exits up l., 
laughing.) 

Sam. (Crossing h.) Well, I’ll bet you there’s an 
accident. I know more about accidents than you 
do. 

( Swift enters up r. with drink on tray, starts to 
cross to Sam. The phone hell rings. They 
look at each other frightened, sure that it is 
Perkins phoning. Swift goes to table and 
puts tray down, starts to pick up the phone.) 

Sam. Get away from that, ge*t away from that. 

Swift. (Puts phone down) You answer it, Mr. 
Harrington. 

Sam. I don’t know what to say to him. (The 
phone rings again. Sam starts L.j Tell him the 
phone’s out of order. 

Swift. Please answer it, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. But I don’t know what to say to him. ^Sam 
goes to table, picks up phone, as he does so it rings 
again, startles him, he puts it down.) You answer it, 
you answer it. 

Swift. No, sir, you do it, please. (Picks up the 
phone and hands it to SamJ 

Sam. (In phone) Hooray. 

Swift. Not hooray, hello. (Picks up coffee tray 
and starts to exit. He has caught one arm through 
the telephone cord when he handed it to Sam. Now 



82 


THE HOTTENTOT 


he almost pulls the phone out of Sam’s hand.) I 
beg your pardon, sir. 

Sam. (To SwiftJ Look out, what are you do¬ 
ing? (In phone.) No, not you. 

Swift. (Turns around and tries to go the other 
way) I’m very sorry. 

Sam. (To Swift) Get out. 

Swift. If you’ll let me through here, Mr. Har¬ 
rington, I’ll be out of your way in a minute. (He 
crawls under Sam’s arm and steps over wire.) 

Sam. Shut up and get out. (In phone.) No, sir, 
not you. 

Swift. I’m trying to, sir. 

Sam. What are you doing? 

Swift. (Turns around and steps over wire the 
other way, again crawling under Sam’s arm) I’m 
trying to get out of this tangle, sir, I’m all right 
now. 

Sam. (To Swift) No, you’re not all right now. 
(In phone.) I wasn’t speaking to you. 

Swift. (Crying) What shall I do? 

Sam. (To Swift ) Put it down, put it down. 

Swift. (Puts tray on table, takes cord from 
around his arm) Thank you, sir. (Picks up tray 
and exits up r.) 

Sam. (Looking after Swift) Idiot! (In phone.) 
Oh, no, sir, not you. Someone was on the line. 
Who is this ? Who ? Perkins. (Covers phone.) 
Just what I thought. (In phone.) Hello, Perkins. 
How’s everything? Where are you, Perkins? I 
say, where are you, Perkins ? At the stable. (Cov¬ 
ers phone.) Just what I thought. (In phone.) 
Isn’t it kind of late to be over at the stable, unless 
something’s happened ? What ? Something has hap¬ 
pened. (Covers phone.) Just what I thought. (In 
phone.) Yes, he’s here; Mr. Fairfax is here, but 
he’s very busy playing cards. I wouldn’t like to 
disturb him. What? You have an important mes- 



The Hottentot” 2 nd Act 





















• -»* • , 




4 *. ■ 




























# 










.» 




























6 


t 

















THE HOTTENTOT 


83 

sage for him? (Covers phone.) Just what I 
thought. (In phone.) Perkins, you give me the 

message, I’ll deliver it- I won't let anybody hear 

it. No, won’t, won't —I’ll whisper it to him. You 
can give me the message. I know it’s private, but 
you can give it to me. Tell me some of it. Is it 
about an animal, or anything? You must talk to 
Mr. Fairfax—very well, hold the phone. (Puts phone 
on table, goes up l. and calls.) Oh, Mr. Fair-flax. 
Alec. (Off stage l.) Yes? 

Sam. Can you step here a moment, please? 
Alec. Certainly. Ollie, take my hand, will you. 
I’ll be back in a minute. 

Ollie. Surely. (Alec enters up l.J 
Alec. Yes? 

Sam. I’m sorry to call you out from the card 
game, but there’s a message. 

Alec. Oh, thank you. (Crosses r. to table and 
picks up phone.) 

Sam. I don’t suppose it amounts to anything. 
Alec. (In phone) Hello? 

Sam. A telephone message. 

Alec. (Clicks receiver hook) Hello? 

Sam. He knows that, I said hello. 

Alec. (In phone) Yes, Perkins. What? Well, 
are you -sure ? 

Sam. Maybe something’s the matter. 

(A long pause, Alec listening at phone, Sam crosses 
and stands at his elbow, leans over and tries to 
hear what Perkins is saying. Alec turns very 
slowly away from Sam until he has his back 
to him. Sam is so intent on listening that he 
does not realize, leans over further, fails to hear 
anything, looks up, sees that Alec’s back is 
turned. So nervous he can hardly control him¬ 
self. Crosses to c.) 



THE HOTTENTOT 


&4 


Alec. (In phone) And have you examined all 
the stalls? No, no, don’t you do that. I’ll notify 
the police. (Sam grows more nervous.) You don f t 
say? (A Jong pause, during which Sam paces up 
and down, finally goes down L. of table and starts 
to sit. As he does so Alec speaks again in phone.) 
You don’t say? (Sam rises and goes up c. Another 
long pause.) You don’t say? 

Sam. (Unable to control himself any longer) 
Why don’t you make him say, make him say ? He’s 
working for you, if he was working for me I’*d make 
him say it. 

Alec. (In phone) Yes, I’ll be right over. Now 
don’t mention this to a soul until I get there. 
(Hangs up.) 

Sam. (Going to him) What is it? 

Alec. I think someone’s trying to have a little 
fun with us. 

Sam. What’s it about? 

Alec. I’d rather not talk about it until I go over 
and investigate. ( Goes up c. and exits. Calls from 
off stage.) Will you tell the others I’ve gone over 
to the stable to see what’s wrong? 

Sam. (Stands in windozv looking after him. 
Swift enters up r. with drink on tray. He is 
frightened and creeps into room, looking around him 
and feeling his way along wall) Yes, I’ll tell them. 
You’ve gone over to the stable to see what’s wrong. 
You don’t have to go over to the stable, you can 
stay right here; I can tell you what’s wrong. (As 
Swift reaches window Sam turns, they see each 
other for first time, both startled, Sam jumps, Swift 
yells.) Don’t do that. That’s the second time you’ve 
done that to me. 

Swift. I wasn’t doing anything to me —er, to 
you. 

Sam. (Crossing down L.) Don’t spy on me. 

Swift. I wasn’t spying on you, sir- 



THE HOTTENTOT 85 

Sam. Don't spy on me. I’m an American citizen, 
I bought Liberty bonds- (Sits, down h.) 

Swift. I wasn't spying on you, sir; I thought I 
heard the bell and I brought you this drink. (His 
hand is trembling so that he can hardly hold the 
tray.) Please take it, Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Stop shimmying, shop shimmying! 

Swift. (Holds tray with both hands, it still 
shakes) I can't help it, sir. 

Sam. Then put it down. 

Swift. Thank you, sir. (Starts to take drink.) 

Sam. On the table, you idiot, on the table. 

Swift. Yes, sir. (Puts tray on table fl.) I’m ter¬ 
ribly nervous, sir. (Goes c.) 

Sam. You're nervous? So am I nervous, but I 
don't go around shaking trays like that. You must 
learn to control your nerves. You’ll be more nervous 
when I tell you that Perkins has just phoned to Mr. 

Fairfax - (Swift is almost frantic, doubled up 

with fear and nervousness, stands on one foot bit¬ 
ing his fingers.) What are you doing? 

Swift. Nothing, sir. 

Sam. Don’t say you're not doing anything. Stand 
still! (Tries to show Swift how to control himself 
by doubling up his fists and holding his hands down 
at his side.) Like this. ('Swift tries to do it, doubles 
up his fists, but can't stand still and keeps working 
his arms up and down.) Don't keep doing it! Just 
once! 

Swift. Yes, sir, just once, that's all. 

Sam. Do you want to hear this? 

Swift. Yes, sir, please tell me. 

Sam. Then stand still! fSwiFT manages to do 
so.) You're getting me so nervous I don't know 
what I'm doing. I don't know what Perkins told 

him, but he had him on the phone just now- 

Whatever he said I couldn't get, but I could tell 
from his voice that he was telling him. All he said 



86 


THE HOTTENTOT 


was, ‘‘You don’t say, you don’t say, you don’t say ?” 
I couldn’t make out a word, but I could tell by the 
way he put the phone down and rushed out of here. 
“You tell the others I’ve gone over to the stable to 
see what’s wrong.” I knew they’ve discovered that 
Bountiful had been stolen. 

Swift. (Starts pacing back and forth , crying) 
Oh—Mr. Harrington. 

Sam. Sh! Keep quiet! 

Swift. Oh, oh, oh, Mr. Harrington, what am I 
going to do? 

Sam. (Crossing up l. to see if anyone can hear 
them) Shut up! Will you keep quiet? (Crosses to 
r., same business.) 

Swift. I can’t keep quiet in the face of this. 
Think what it means to me? 

Sam. Think what it means to me- 

Swift. They’ll send me to the Penitentiary, I’ll 
lose my position, my reputation. They’ll send me 
to prison- 

Sam. What about my reputation- 

Swift. But it was I who stole the horse- 

Sam. Never mind that, keep quiet, the neigh¬ 
bors will hear you- 

Swift. I don’t care about the neighbors - 

Sam. Well, I do; keep quiet, the servants- 

Swift. I’m not thinking about the servants, 
I’m- 

Sam. ("Sam takes watch from pocket, dangles it 
before Swift ) Look what I’ve got, look. 

Swift. (Stamps his feet) I don’t want it, I 
don’t want it. (Sam goes up l., looks off to see if 
anyone has heard them . Swift paces up and down 
crying.) Oh, Mr. Harrington, Mr. Harrington, tell 
me, what am I going to do? (Sam comes down c. 
to Swift, laughing loudly to try and cover his 
noise.) Oh, don’t laugh, don’t laugh. 

Sam. Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! (Frightens 


THE HOTTENTOT 87 

Swift into silence; he stops crying.) Anyone to 
look at you would know you were a horse thief. 

(Loud explosion off stage. They both jump. Sam 
turns and runs up c. and exits, talking ad lib.) 

Swift. (Runs up r. Stops, runs back to table 
and grabs drink. Starts to drink it. The phone 
bell rings, startles him and he speaks into glass.) 
Hello! (Puts down glass, picks up phone.) Hello? 
What? What? You don’t say? Yes, I’m sorry 
too. (Hangs up receiver.) Good-bye. ("Larry en¬ 
ters up l. and watches Swift. Swift picks up tray 
and again starts to drink, sees Larry, puts glass be¬ 
hind his back, holds out the empty tray to LarryJ 
Did you ring, sir? 

Larry. No. (Points to drink.) What is that? 
Swift. (Looking at tray) That? (Sees that 
Larry is pointing to drink, brings it out from be¬ 
hind his back and puts it on tray.) Oh, that? That’s 
whiskey, sir, I thought perhaps you might—er—it’s 

getting a little chilly—Mr. Harrington might- 

Larry. Swift, have you been drinking? 

Swift. (Assuming a dignified manner) Mam— 
er—sir. I never drink. (Turns and runs off r., an¬ 
swering an imaginary call.) Coming, sir; coming, 
sir, coming. (Exits. Larry crosses to r. and stands 
above chair l. of table, looking after SwiftJ 
Alec. (Calling from off stage) Peggy! Peggy! 
(Enters up c., followed by Sam, who crosses down 
extreme R.) Peggy! 

("Peggy enters up l., followed by Mrs. Chadwick 
and Ollie. Ollie goes down extreme l. Mrs. 
Chadwick goes down l. and stands behind 
settee.) 

Peggy. (Going to AlecJ Yes, Alec? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Alec. (Putting his arm around her) Now don’t 
get excited, Peggy, but Bountiful’s been stolen. 

( Peggy screams. General ad lib from all, “What?” 
etc. Swift enters up r. and comes down R. of 
Sam. May enters up L.) 

May. What is it? 

Peggy. Bountiful’s been stolen. (She puts her 
head on Alec’s shoulder, sobbing. Swift and Sam 
look at each other, both terribly nervous and 
frightened.) 

May. What? (She goes down l. and sits.) 
Alec. (To PeggyJ Now take it easy, dear, we’ll 
never leave a stone unturned to get to the bottom of 
this. I’ve wired to New York for detectives. 

("Swift takes key from his pocket, slips it into 
Sam’s hand and runs off up r. Sam has busi¬ 
ness of not knowing what to do with it.) 

Peggy. Have you looked everywhere for her ? 
Alec. Of course I’ve looked everywhere. 

Ollie. Well, I can’t understand anyone around 
here stealing a horse. 

("Sam lifts up table-throw and starts to hide key un¬ 
der it. Larry turns and catches him. Sam 
quickly puts key behind back.) 

Larry. (Looking suspiciously at Sam) Well, I 
can. (Crosses to him.) This is some cheap trick 
to interfere with the race. 

Sam. Yes, it’s terrible, and I had -my heart set 
on riding Bountiful tomorrow. 

Larry. Yes; I’ll bet you’re terribly disappointed. 
Sam. Of course I’m disappointed. (Takes jockey 


THE HOTTENTOT 89 

cap from table , holds it up.) There's my hat all 
ready, and everything. 

Perkins. (Calling from off stage) Mr. Fair¬ 
fax! (Enters up c., comes down to Alec.) Mr. 
Fairfax. 

Alec. What is it, Perkins? 

Perkins. I’ve found Bountiful. 

Alec. Found Bountiful? Where? 

Sam. In the winter stable, where do you sup¬ 
pose - (Realizes what he has said, claps hand 

over his mouth. All look at him, puzzled and sus¬ 
picious.) 

Perkins. Yes, that's where I found her, in the 
winter stable. (Goes up c.) 

Peggy. Isn’t that wonderful? 

(General ad lib from all . Peggy goes down l. and 
talks to Ollie and May. Alec crosses to Mrs. 
Chadwick, they talk.) 

Larry. (Watching Sam, more suspicious than 
ever) Yes, wonderful. 

Ollie. I wonder who put Bountiful in the win¬ 
ter stable. 

Larry. Yes, possibly Mr. Harrington can tell 
us. 

Peggy. (Turning) Mr. Harrington? 

Sam. (Crossing to Peggy) Yes, I can tell you. 
I put Bountiful in the winter stable. (Holds up 
key.) And there’s the key to prove it. 

Larry. Well, why did you do that? 

Sam. (Turning to Larry) So that you couldn’t 
harm her and prevent me winning the race tomor¬ 
row for Miss Fairfax. 


CURTAIN 



ACT III 


Scene: A hillside clearing. The following day. 

At Rise: Peggy is discovered seated l. of table. 
Ollie stands up l. looking through pair of 
field-glasses. Larry stands in back seat of car, 
Alec in front seat, both are in jockey suits, 
Alec wears white, with blue cross-bars and red 
cap. Larry wears orange, with red cross-bars 
and green cap. May stands on running-board 
of car. All are looking- off up l. in direction 
of the race course. After a slight pause, Ollie 
crosses down r., puts field-glasses on table. 

Ollie. Wonderful day for the race, isn’t it? 

Alec. Great. 

Ollie. Have a drink, boys? 

Alec. Not me. . 

Larry. Well, I will. (Larry, Alec and May 
get down from car and come down l. of table.) 

Ollie. It’s too bad Bountiful is out of condition. 

Larry. Well, who’s fault is that? It’s Harring¬ 
ton’s, isn’t it? 

Ollie. Apparently, yes. That’s what I can’t 
understand, how a great horseman like Harrington 
could leave a barrel of apples and a bucket of water 
right where the mare could get at it—and did. 
(Hands Larry a highball and takes one himself. 
The drinks have been poured before the curtain, 
he has only added seltzer.) 

Larry. (Holding up his glass) Well, here’s to 
the race. 


90 



The Hottentot” 3 rd Act 
































THE HOTTENTOT 


9i 

Ollie. (Raises his glass) And in the interest of 
sport, may the best man win. 

Larry. Thank you. (Drinks. All laugh.) 

Alec. (Laughing) Oh, you don’t say ? 

Ollie. Have you seen Mr. Harrington, Peggy? 

Peggy. Not since last night. 

Larry. That was a pretty dirty trick, interfering 
with your mare. 

Peggy. Don’t, Larry. 

Ollie. Alec, have you seen Mr. Harrington? 

Alec. No, but I do know he’s feeling pretty rot¬ 
ten. 

Larry. Good. 

Alec. You don’t like him, do you, Larry? 

Larry. I do not. 

Alec. Peggy, dear, Pm awfully sorry Bountiful 
can’t start today. 

Peggy. Please don’t speak of it. 

La$ry. The only thing I’m sorry about is that I’m 
not going to ride against this faker. 

Peggy. Larry! 

May. What do you mean, Larry; what is it you 
know about Mr. Harrington? 

Larry. I’ve known all along he wasn’t going to 
ride Bountiful. 

Peggy. Plow could.you know that? 

Larry. Mrs. Chadwick told me. At least she 
told me she didn’t wish him to, which comes to the 
same thing. 

Peggy. I don’t believe it. 

Larry. No? Well, you will believe it before the 
day is over. (Crosses up l. and leans against fence, 
drinking.) 

Alec. Well, I think it’s a shame. (Crosses up l. 
and stands talking to Larry in Pantomime.) 

Ollie. (To Peggy J I know you had your heart 
set on winning the cup. 

Peggy. Yes, but it wasn’t to be—just a break 


92 


THE HOTTENTOT 


against me, that’s all. Just racing luck, you know. 
So please don’t let’s say anything more about it. 

Ollie. (Leaning over the back of her chair and 
putting his arms about her) Well, that’s a mighty 
big way of looking at it, but I know it’s a great dis¬ 
appointment to you just the same. 

Peggy. (Unable to control herself any longer, 
bursts into tears. Rises and goes to May, who puts 
her arms around her and tries to comfort her) Oh, 
Ollie, Ollie, please don’t. 

May. (Leads Peggy dozvn l.J Ollie, don’t talk 
to her. (They both exit down l., Peggy in tears and 
May trying to comfort her.) 

Ollie. (Follows them dozvn l. Turns to Alec 
and Larry ) I wish you fellows would keep your 
mouths shut. 

Alec. Why, I didn’t say anything. 

Larry. You were the one that made her cry. 

(All exit down R. talking ad lib. Swift enters 
down r., looks about, goes to table and pours 
himself a drink. Perkins enters up l., crosses 
dozvn c. and stands watching SwiftJ 

Perkins. What kind of a job do you call that? 

Swift. A very good one, I should say. 

Perkins. Do you think you can do it alone, or 
would you like to hire an assistant? 

Swift. Meaning yourself? 

Perkins. Yes. 

Swift. Well, are you a good, first-class drinker? 

Perkins. I have some very good references from 
my last place. 

Swift. (Pouring Perkins a drink) Yes, but 
nowadays servants don’t have references—they have 
preferences. (Puts Perkins’ drink on l. side of 
table. Pours himself one. They both sit. Per¬ 
kins l. and Swift r. of table.) Hooray. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


93 


Perkins. Hooray. (Both drink.) Have a ciga¬ 
rette? (Offering him one from package he takes 
from his pocket.) 

Swift. No, thanks, I prefer my own. (Takes 
cigarette from humidor on table.) Mr. Perkins, 
what's this I hear about Sam being indisposed? 

Perkins. Who said so? (Lights cigarette.) 

Swift. Alec. (Lights cigarette.) Yes, he was 
just here and I heard him tell Okie, and Larry, 
that Sam wasn't a bit fit. 

Perkins. Mr. Swift, Fve half a mind to tell you 
something about Sam. 

Swift. Mr. Perkins, what I know about Sam 
I’m not at liberty to say. 

Perkins. Last night, you mean? 

Swift. What do you know about last night? 

Perkins. Didn't I hear him slipping into our 
stable at three o’clock this morning, with that old 
roan horse from the Academy, and the horse sweat¬ 
ing like he’d been at it all night. 

Swift. Sh! Shut up. (Rises, looks about to 
make sure they are alone, comes back and leans over 
back of table.) Now remember, Perkins, I don’t 
want you to breathe a word of this to Peggy, or 
May. 

Perkins. No, the girls won’t get a word out 
of me. 

Swift. (Goes r. of table and sits) It was I 
who got Sam that horse. 

Perkins. You?. 

Swift. Yes. Sam was a bit nervous last night, 
poor chap, he asked my advice and—well, I ar¬ 
ranged the matter for him. You know I’ve taken 
quite a fancy to Sam. 

Perkins. Yes, Sam’s all right. 

Swift. Yes. Good skate. Stand another? 

Perkins. Yes. (Swift pushes bottle toward 
him.)' No, no. This is on me. 


94 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Swift. Don’t be silly, this is mine. 

Perkins. (Pours drink, passes bottle to Swift, 
who pours himself another drink) Sam’s as sly as 
they make ’em. They all think he ain’t seen this 
course, and don’t know the jumps, but you don’t 
catch an old one like him that way. He steals out 
in the middle of the night. (Holds up glass.) Well, 
hooray. 

Swift. Hooray. (Sam enters up r., comes down 
back of table, as they are about to drink he speaks.) 

Sam. Did you ring, sir? (They both jump, al¬ 
most choke, put glasses down, Swift runs off down 
R.J 

Perkins. (Running off down r.) I beg your par¬ 
don, sir, I beg your pardon. (He exits. Peggy en¬ 
ters down l., followed by Larry. They cross to c.) 

Larry. Well, how is America’s greatest, and 
gamest, gentleman rider? 

Sam. You look all right. How do you feel? 

Larry. Oh, I feel great. How do you feel? 

Sam. All right. 

Larry. I thought perhaps you’d be a bit sore after 
your spill over the wall with the Hottentot. 

Peggy. Larry, pardon me, I’d like a minute with 
Mr. Harrington. 

Larry. (Crossing down l.) All right, I’ll leave 
you alone with your marvelous rider. (Turns.) 
Well, Peggy, I may not see you before the race. 
Aren’t you going to wish me anything? 

Peggy. (Crosses to him and gives him her hand) 
Yes, Larry, I wish you all kinds of luck. 

Sam. So do I. All kinds. 

Larry. (Glares at Sam) Thank you, Peggy. 
(Exits down l.J 

Sam. (Crosses to her) May I have a minute 
with you,- Miss Fairfax? 

Peggy. Yes, but before you say anything, Mr. 
Harrington, I want to tell you that I don’t blame you 


THE HOTTENTOT 


95 


in the least for anything that happened last night. 
Whatever you did I know was done from the best 
of motives. 

Sam. Before you say anything more, Miss Fair¬ 
fax, I want to tell you something, and what Fve got 
to tell you is the toughest thing I’ve ever had to do 
in my life. Now, I’m not the man you think I 
am at all, I’m the other fellow, the one out west, 
the one that lost his nerve. When I came here I 
didn’t know you were so fond of horses, and when 
I did find it out I was too much in love with you 
to tell you the truth—but I’m going to tell you the 
truth now. I did give you my word I’d ride Boun¬ 
tiful, and then I hadn’t nerve enough to go through 
with it. That’s why Bountiful was hidden, so I 
wouldn’t have to ride her. That’s why I bought the 
Hottentot, so I wouldn’t have to ride him. Ever 
since that accident out west I’ve had a yellow streak 
in me that I’m going to get rid of right now. I’m 
going to ride in this race, and I’m going to ride 
your horse, and in your colors. 

Peggy. Bountiful ? 

Sam. No. The Hottentot. 

Peggy. But the Hottentot isn’t my horse. 

Sam. He is now, and I’m going to try and win 
with him. 

Peggy. What ? 

Sam. I’m either going to make you look up to 
me and say “Good boy, Sam”—or look down at me 
and say, “Doesn’t he look natural.” 

Peggy. I can’t let you take this risk for me, Mr. 
Harrington. 

Sam. You haven’t got anything to do with it 
now, Miss Fairfax, I’ve made up my mind. Didn’t 
you tell h le to keep jumping on a horse until I got 
my nerve back again? 

Peggy. Yes. 

Sam. Well, if I don’t get it back on the Hotten- 


96 THE HOTTENTOT 

tot, I don't want it—it’s no good. (He crosses 
down R.j 

Peggy. Mr. Harrington. (He stops, she crosses 
to him. Giving him her hand.) I wish you all the 
luck in the world. 

Sam. Thank you. I’ll need it 

(He exits down r. Mrs. Chadwick enters up r., 
followed by Captain Reggie Townsend; he 
is in uniform.) 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Crossing to c.) Come on, 
Reggie, do hurry, please. (Dllie and May enter 
down l. Cross to Mrs. Chadwick.J 

Reggie. Right behind you, dear. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Hello, Ollie, May, Peggy. (An 
ad lib greeting from all.) 

Ollie. I wondered if you were going to get here 
in time. 

Mrs. Chadwick. You don’t think I’d miss this 
perfectly priceless race. Mr. Gilford, Mrs. Gilford 
and Miss Fairfax; may I present General- 

Reggie. (Correcting her) Captain! 

Mrs. Chadwick. Of course. Captain Reggie 
Townsend, of the three-hundred and thirty-third 
Aero Squadron, Y. M. C. A. 

Reggie. Not Y. M. C. A. C.M., M.M., D.S.M. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Of course, C.M., M.M., D.A.M. 

Reggie. Carol. Not D.A.M. Can’t you remem¬ 
ber-■ 

Mrs. Chadwick. No, I can’t. 

Reggie. Well, I can. I can remember who I am. 
(To the others.) I’m Captain Townsend. (An ad lib 
greeting from all.) I’m glad to know you all, I’ll 
tell the world. 

Ollie. (Crosses Mrs. Chadwick to Reggie ) 
And I’m glad to know you; in fact. I’m proud to 
know you. (They shake hands.) 


THE HOTTENTOT 


97 


Reggie. Thank you. 

Peggy. Of course you all know there’s an added 
starter. 

All. An added starter? 

Peggy. Yes, my horse, Hottentot. 

Ollie. The Hottentot? Your horse? 

Peggy. Yes. 

Ollie. Have you got a rider—he’s a very dan¬ 
gerous horse? 

Reggie. I don’t care how dangerous he is, I’ll 
ride him. 

May. Why, Ollie, I thought there was no one 
who dared to ride him. 

Peggy. (Crosses in front of table, and sits l. 
of it) No one does dare to ride him but my Sam— 
er, I mean my Sam Harrington—er, I mean Mr. 
Sam Harrington. 

Ollie. Mr. Harrington, eh? 

Peggy. Yes. The world’s greatest, and gamest, 
gentleman rider. (To Mrs. Chadwick.,) Harring¬ 
ton, S.A.M. (All laugh.) 

Ollie. I always knew he was a smart horseman. 
Now I know why he hid Bountiful. 

Mrs. Chadwick. So he could ride the Hotten¬ 
tot, it’s plain enough to me. 

May. Well, he has courage, I’ll say that for 
him. 

Mrs. Chadwick. And I’ll say he’s gone com¬ 
pletely “cookoo.” 

May. (Notices wedding ring on Mrs. Chad¬ 
wick’s hand. Holds it up) Carol, what’s this? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Now, isn’t that perfectly pois¬ 
onous of me. I knew there was something I’d for¬ 
gotten to tell you. 

All. What is it? 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Pointing to Reggie ) This is 
my husband. 

All. What? 


98 THE HOTTENTOT 

Reggie. Yes, we were married this morning, I’ll 
tell the world. 

fP eggy crosses to Mrs. Chadwick and the girls 
congratulate her, Ollie congratulates Reggie .) 

Ollie. (Shaking Reggie’s hand) So you’re mar¬ 
ried, eh? 

Reggie. Yes. 

Ollie. What’s the matter, didn’t you get enough 
fighting on the other side? 

Reggie. (Laughs) No. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Who has been listening) 
What? (All laugh. Bugle call is heard off stage l.) 

Ollie. We’d better go down and wish the boys 
luck. 

(All except Ollie exit down l. talking ad lib. He 
starts to follow. Swift and Perkins enter 
down R.J 

Perkins. (Running across to fence up l.) Come 
on, Mr. Swift, I’ve got a great place to watch the 
race. (Climbs up on bottom rail of fence.) 

Swift. (Running after him) Aren’t you clever. 
That happens to be my place, so get out of there. 
(Pulls him off the fence.) 

Ollie. Swift! 

Swift. That’s all right, sir; this is my place, 
and I’m going to watch the race from here. 
Ollie. Will you please stop quarreling? 

Swift. I’m not quarreling, sir; but this person, 

this foreigner- 

Perkins. Foreigner ? 

Swift. Yes, foreigner! 

Ollie. Swift, now you listen to me- 

Swift. No, Mr. Gilford, the time has come when 
you must listen to me. I am a butler, sir, but I 




The Hottentot” srd Act 

















THE HOTTENTOT 


99 


wasn’t always a butler. I was a janitor of one 
of the largest apartment houses in Brooklyn, 
and- 

Ollie. Will you please stop quarreling, for my 
sake, please? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Ollie. Thank you. (Gives a sigh of relief.) 

Swift. You’re welcome. And hereafter I’m go¬ 
ing to stand on my own rights. (He climbs up on 
rail of fence, it breaks with him and he falls to the 
ground.) 

Perkins. (Laughs at tim) Go ahead and stand 
on your own rights. I’ll find another place, etc. (He 
exits down l. talking ad lib. Ollie follows. Sam 
enters down r., carrying small leather grip, which he 
places behind table.) 

Sam. Swift, I want you to help me. (Comes 
dozvn c. and starts to unbutton his trousers.) 

Swift. (Crossing to him) Yes, sir. 

Sam. Pull these trousers off. (He pulls them 
down and sits L. of table.) 

Swift. Oh, Mr. Harrington. (Looks about, em¬ 
barrassed.) 

Sam. It’s all right; go on, pull them off. 

Swift. All right, sir. 

fSwiFT stoops down and starts to pull them off, the 
left leg first.) 

Sam. Listen, the right foot first with me, al¬ 
ways. 

Swift. Yes, sir. (Pulls trousers off and puts 
them across back of chair r. of table. Sam removes 
his coat and muffler, hands them to Swift, who 
places them with trousers. Sam is dressed in 
jockey clothes. Swift notices it for the first time.) 
Mr. Harrington, what are you doing with those 
things on? 



IOO 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Sam. I’m going to ride in the race today. I’m 
going to ride for Miss Fairfax. 

Swift. But Bountiful isn’t in condition. 

Sam. I know all about that, she’s full of apples. 
I’m going to ride the Hottentot. ("Swift groans.) 
Stop that! Where’s my grip? 

Swift. (Pointing to it) Right there, sir. 

Sam. Are my riding boots in it? 

Swift. I don’t know, sir. 

Sam. Will you look and see? 

Swift. (Looks in grip) Yes, sir, the boots are 
there. 

Sam. Well, you won’t break any of your union 
rules if you get them out and give them to me, will 
you? 

Swift. No, sir. ("Sam sits l. of table. Swift 
gets the boots, comes down, kneels, and starts to take 
off Sam’s shoes, the left first.) 

Sam. Right, right. The right foot first. 

Swift. I beg your pardon, sir, I forgot. (Takes 
right shoe off.) 

Sam. (Puts his foot on the ground, lifts it up) 
What is that I’m standing in, whiskey, or dew? 

Swift. (Touches ground zvith his fingers, then 
smells them) That’s dew, sir. (Takes left shoe off, 
starts to put on the left boot, Sam stops him.) 

Sam. Now listen, which is your right hand? 

Swift. This one, sir. (Holds it up.) 

Sam. Now, which is my right foot? 

Swift. (Puts his hand on Sam’s left foot) This 
one—er —(Quickly changes it to his right foot .)— 
this one. 

Sam. Well, of course, with two guesses you ought 
to get it right. (Sees pin on the ground, picks it 
up. As he is putting it in his blouse he notices some 
salt spilled on the table. He throws it over his left 
shoulder. Swift watches him.) 

Swift. You are superstitious? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


ioi 


Sam. Yes, very (Putting on his hoots.) 

Swift. (Sighs) Oh, dear, oh, dear. 

Sam. What are you oh, dearing about? 

Swift. Nothing, sir; I was just wondering how 
you dare ride today. 

Sam. Why today? 

Swift. Friday, the thirteenth. 

Sam. Is this Friday, the thirteenth? 

Swift. Yes, sir. 

Sam. Are you sure? 

Swift. Yes, sir, it’s my brother Sam’s birthday. 
(Sighs.) Oh, oh, oh. 

Sam. Do you know the words of that? (Swift 
rises to his feet, crosses up behind table and starts 
arranging Sam’s clothes on chair. Sam gets up, 
looks himself over.) I’ve forgotten something. 

Swift. (Thinks a moment) Spurs? 

Sam. Spurs? For the Hottentot? One click and 
I’d be on another horse. (Thinks a moment.) Cap, 
the cap. 

Swift. Yes, sir. (Gets cap from grip, puts it on 
Sam, it goes down over his eyes.) 

Sam. Now look what you’ve done. (Gropes for 
Swift J Where are you? 

Swift. (Behind him trying to straighten cap) 
Right here, sir. (Adjusts cap.) 

Sam.^ Where’s my whip? 

Swift. (Picks up grip, looks in it, takes out whip 
without knowing it. It is a child's whip, about a 
foot and a half long, with a whistle in the end.) No 
whip here, sir. 

Sam. There it is in your hand. 

Swift. (Puts bag down, holds up the whip) 
Whip? 

Sam. (Taking it) Yes. I’m not going to hit the 
Hottentot with it. It’s a trick. If any of the other 

horses get near me- (He blows two sharp blasts 

on the whistle.) Frighten them. 


102 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Perkins. (Calling off stage l.) Announcement. 
Added sarter, Mr. Sam Harrington rides the Hot¬ 
tentot, No. 13. (He walks up stage, voice growing 
fainter.) Announcement. Added starter, Mr. Sam 
Harrington rides the Hottentot, No. 13. ^Sam and 
Swift look at each other. Swift shakes his 
head.) 

Sam. How do I look? 

Swift. You look fine, sir. But you can see for 
yourself, Til give you the mirror. (As he takes 
mirror from grip he strikes it against table, it breaks. 
Sam rushes for him, Swift retreats.) It was an ac¬ 
cident, sir; I’m sorry, sir; it was an accident. 

Sam. Did I ask you for a mirror? 

Swift. No, sir, but the mirror was in the bag, 
and you asked me how you looked, and I thought 
you’d like to look for yourself. 

Sam. Look for myself? 

Swift. I mean, see for yourself. I’m very sorry, 
sir. (Sighs.) I would break a mirror just before 
the race? 

Sam. Yes, you would. 

Swift. I feel terribly about it, sir, I did the very 
same thing just before my poor brother Sam was- 

^Sam picks up chair and starts to go for him, Swift 
cries out in fright and runs off down r. Sam 
goes to table and gets cigarette, he is very nerv¬ 
ous and his hand trembles so that he has to hold 
the match with both hands. Lights cigarette. 
Larry enters down l.J 

Larry. So you’re going to ride the Hottentot? 

Sam. Yes. 

Larry. Well, I’d give a good deal to see you on 
that horse. 

Sam. How much would you give? 

Larry. Just to show what I think of you, I’ll bet 



THE HOTTENTOT 


103 

you a hundred dollars you don’t dare get on the 
Hottentot and go to the starting post. 

Sam. Make it five hundred? 

Larry. Yes, I’d give that much to see you make 
a fool of yourself. 

Sam. I can see you do it for nothing. I’ll take 
that bet, five hundred. 

Larry. Yes, and if I thought you had the nerve 
to try it, I’d bet you five hundred to a hundred that 
you’d never get over the first jump. 

Sam. I’ll take that one, too. 

Larry. Yes, and I’ll bet you a thousand to a hun¬ 
dred that you never get to the finish. 

Sam. I’ll take all three bets. 

Larry. And remember that other little bet I have 
with you. 

Sam. I’ll remember it. You remember it. You 
don’t have to remind me. It isn’t so little, five 
thousand dollars. 

Larry. Yes, don’t forget that. (Shakes his fin¬ 
ger in Sam’s face.) 

Sam. I won’t. (Shakes his finger in Larry’s 
face.) 

Larry. You didn’t think I’d bet that much. 
(Repeats business.) 

Sam. I didn’t think you had that much. (Repeats 
business.) You’re a little bit peeved with me, aren’t 
you? 

Larry. Well, under the conditions you can’t ex¬ 
pect me to think very much of you. 

Sam.. No, I know you couldn’t. 

Larry. I couldn’t what? 

Sam. Think very much. And under what con¬ 
ditions ? * What have I ever done to you ? Why are 
you so sore at me? 

Larry. Well, for several reasons, the principal 
one is that I’m very fond of Miss Fairfax. 

Sam. So am I. 


104 


THE HOTTENTOT 


Larry. And that was a pretty nasty crack you 
made at me last night. 

Sam. About Bountiful? 

Larry. Yes. 

Sam. Well, I apologized for that. 

Larry. Yes, you apologized, but you’ve got such 
a twisted sense of humor I couldn’t tell whether you 
were apologizing, or rubbing it in. 

Sam. Well, then I’ll tell you— I was. 

Larry. You’re clever on and off a horse, aren’t 
you? 

Sam. On and off, yes. On and off. 

Larry. (Crossing to him, they stand face to face) 
Well, I’m going to give you a little advice. You 
keep away from Miss Fairfax, because if you don’t 
I’m going to stick a prong into you, and turn it 

around. And I want to tell you something else- 

(Doubles up his fist, Sam grabs it.) 

Sam. And I want to tell you something; I don’t 
know anything about my chances with Miss Fairfax, 
but I’m not going to discuss them with you. 

Larry. Well, I’m going to discuss them with 
you. I want you to clear out of here; I’m coming 
back here after the race, and if you’re still here- 

Sam. I’ll be here, but if you say another word to 
me I’ll break your neck. 

Larry. What? 

Sam. Yes, I’d do it right now, only I don’t want 
to spoil the race. 

Larry. Are you trying to pick a fight with me ? 

Sam. No, I wouldn’t fight with you here. 

Larry. Why not ? 

Sam. You haven’t got anyone here to pull me off 
of you. 

Larry. (Crossing l.) Well, I’ll see you after the 
race. 

Sam. I hope so. (Bugle call heard off l.) 

Larry. Do you know what that is? 




THE HOTTENTOT 


105 


Sam. Fish man, isn't it? 

Larry. No, they’re calling the horses to the 
post. 

Sam. Without the riders? They’re starting the 
thing all wrong. 

Larry. They’re calling the riders, too. 

Sam. Then let them play something I know. I 
don’t know anything about music. 

Larry. (Crossing up l. to fence) V/ell, come on. 
I want to see you get on this horse. Come on, this 
is the short cut. (He vaults over the fence, and 
exits. Calls from off stage.) Come on, Harrington, 
I want to see you get on that Hottentot! 

Sam. (Crosses up l. to fence, prepared to vault 
it, hacks up to take a running jump, swings his arms 
and strikes his hand on car. Crosses down r. to 
table, takes his cap off and feels his head. Looks 
about, then takes napkins from table, puts them in 
his cap and puts cap on. Goes back to fence and 
starts to vault it. Bugle call heard off l. Sam 
blows whistle on his whip, looks about again, backs 
up to fence, puts his hands on top rail and jumps, 
pretending to have vaulted it. Exits.) 

Swift. (Enters down r. Goes to chair and starts 
picking up Sam’s clothes. Talks, half to himself) 
Oh, dear, and he was such a nice man, too. (Sighs.) 
He was mighty good to me. (Puts clothes over his 
arm, picks up grip, sighs.) Ah, well, in the midst of 

life- (Holds up Sam’s trousers and measures 

them.) They’ll be a little too long, I’m afraid. 

(Bugle call off l. Swift exits down r. Ollie en¬ 
ters down l. followed by Mrs. Chadwick, 
Reggie, May and Peggy. 

Ollie. (Crossing up to car) We’d better hurry, 
folks, I wouldn’t miss the start of this race for any¬ 
thing in the world. (He opens doors of car. The 



io6 


THE HOTTENTOT 


others are all talking ad lib.) Listen, everybody, as 
Mr. Harrington’s going to ride today I’d better do a 
little rooting. You know I bet Crawford a thousand 
dollars that Harrington would beat him. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Are you betting on Mr. Har¬ 
rington to win this race? 

Ollie. Yes. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (Turns to May) Do you mind 
if I take a little money from your husband? 

May. No, I wish I could. 

Mrs. Chadwick. (To OllieJ Would you like 
to bet another thousand? 

Ollie. I would. 

Mrs. Chadwick. You’re on. (To May.) How 
about you, May, would you like to bet a thousand ? 

May. Not on Mr. Harrington. 

Peggy. I’ll bet you a thousand. 

Mrs. Chadwick. All right, you’re both on. 

Reggie. I don’t know much about this race, but 
I’d like to make a little bet. 

Mrs. Chadwick. No, no, sergeant. 

Reggie. Sergeant? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Well, corporal, then. 

Reggie. Not corporal, captain. 

Mrs. Chadwick. All right then, captain But only 
in the army, in this family I’m captain. 

Reggie. Thanks, captain. (Laughs, salutes her. 
Bugle call off l. All climb into car talking ad lib. 
Mrs. Chadwick, Peggy and Reggie in the back 
seat, Ollie in the front seat , and May on the run¬ 
ning board on the up-stage side of car.) 

Reggie. Mr. Gilford, is this a good spot to watch 
the race from? 

Ollie. Oh, yes, I always watch the race from 
here, because I love to see the finish. Those that 
finish, finish the other side of that fence, not more 
than twenty feet away. ('Peggy, May and Ollie 


THE HOTTENTOT 107 

have field-glasses. All look off up L. in the direction 
of the course.) 

Peggy. There are the horses going to the post 
now. 

Ollie. Oh, yes. Where’s Alec ? 

May. There he is, can’t you see him? White, 
blue cross-bars, and red cap. 

Ollie. Oh, yes, doesn’t he look fine. 

All. Fine. Great, etc. (Ad lib.) 

Peggy. Where’s Mr. Harrington? 

Ollie. Ned Hatch’s horse looks fit, too. 

Peggy. I know, but where’s Mr. Harrington? 

May. Next to Ned Hatch is Larry Crawford on 
Cannon Ball. 

Peggy. I know, but where’s Mr. Harrington? 

Mrs. Chadwick. Who’s the coming up last? 

Ollie. That’s Mr. Harrington. 

Reggie. It’s a corking sight, I’ll tell the world. 

Ollie. Look sharp! 

All. (After a count of ten) They're off! 

Reggie. (After a slight pause) That’s a good 
start. 

Ollie. They got away well. (A long pause. 
Peggy screams.) 

Reggie. (To Peggy,) What is it? 

Peggy. The Hottentot! (She climbs down out 
of car, stares front, unable to watch the race.) 

Ollie. Harrington’s down! 

May. No, he isn’t! 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh, Ollie, what is it? 

Ollie. The Hottentot refused the first jump, and 
Harrington just managed to stay on. He’s sitting 
on his neck. Well, that’s the end of him. 

Mrs. Chadwick. What did you expect? 

May. Good boy, Alec! Look, Alec’s going to 
the front! 

Ollie. Going to the front nothing, Niblick’s run¬ 
ning away with him. 


io8 


THE HOTTENTOT 


May. Look at them go at the pickets, look, look! 

Reggie. Alec’s getting his horse under control 
now. 

Peggy. Ollie, what’s become of the Hottentot? 

Ollie. He finally did get over the first jump, 
about twenty lengths behind. He’s out of it, but 
he’s going along all right now. 

Reggie. It’s getting faster. 

Ollie. Hello, Cannon Ball’s moved up a bit. 
Look out! 

Peggy. What is it, Ollie? 

Ollie. Onyx refused the board fence, and Billy 
Latimer went over alone. 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh, why don’t they have 
Steeplechases without fences? 

Reggie. Look at that Hottentot, will you! 

Ollie. By Jove, that’s so. When he wants to, 
he certainly can go. Look at him! The Hottentot’s 
going like an express train. 

Peggy. Is he very far behind? 

Ollie. About fifteen lengths, he hasn’t a look-in, 
but he’s going just the same. 

Peggy. Who’s leading? 

Ollie. Alec, about a length ahead. Cannon Ball’s 
second, then Challenge, and then the field. 

Reggie. The field’s very well bunched, I’ll tell 
the world! 

Mrs. Chadwick. Isn’t it thrilling? 

Reggie. Hello! The Hottentot’s moving up 
there! 

Ollie. What do you know about that, look at 
that devil go. Look, look! 

Peggy. V/hat is it, Ollie? 

Ollie. The Hottentot, he’s going like greased 
lightning. He’s gaining on them fast. He’s caught 
up with Wayward. He’s by him. (A sharp cry 
from all, Mrs. Chadwick and May scream.) 

Peggy. What is it? 


THE HOTTENTOT 


109 


Ollie. Alec almost fell at the stone wall. 

May. He’s all right, though! 

Ollie. There goes Cannot Ball, Larry’s passed 
Alec. 

Peggy. Where’s the Hottentot now? 

Ollie. He’s in fourth place now, coming up to 
Challenge. He’s overtaking him. He’s passed him! 
(Peggy climbs up on the running board and watches 
the race.) He’s in third place now and hot after 
Alec. 

May. Go on, Alec! Look out! Look out! 

Reggie. That’s some race he’s running, that Hot¬ 
tentot, I’ll tell the world! 

Ollie. The Hottentot’s got Alec; he’s got 
him! 

May. He’s passed him! 

Ollie. He’s overhauling Cannon Ball. He’s got 
him! Oh, you Hottentot! 

Mrs. Chadwick. Oh! 

Ollie. Go it, Hottentot! Go it, Hottentot! 

Reggie. They’re coming to the water jump! 

Ollie. Look at the Hottentot take that water 
jump! (Waving his cap.) A race, a race. By 
Jove, it’s a race. (All commence to yell “Hottentot, 
Hottentot” Crowd off stage takes it up.) The 
Hottentot wins! 

(All cheer and commence talking at once. Swift, 
Perkins and Celise enter up l., waving their 
hats and cheering, they exit down l. All climb 
down from car, laughing and talking ad lib. 
Congratulate Peggy and then exit down l., 
leaving Peggy alone on stage. Cheers are kept 
up off stage. After a slight pause Sam enters, 
he has lost his cap, his hair is awry, aind his 
blouse is pulled out of his trousers. He carries 
the trophy cup to which Peggy’s colors have 
been tied. He staggers over to Peggy, hands 


no 


THE HOTTENTOT 


her the cup, then leans up against the car, ex¬ 
hausted.) 

Peggy. (Clasping the cup to her) You’ve won 
the race. 

Sam. (Tries to speak, can't, nods. After a 
pause) We got off to a pretty bad start, but when 
the Hottentot gets going he’s some horse—I’ll tell 
the world. 

Peggy. Sam. 

Sam. Peggy. (He crosses to her, they start to 
embrace, she still holds the cup. He throws his 
arms around her, bumps into the cup, almost falls 
backward. Takes cup and puts it on the ground. 
They embrace.) 


CURTAIN 



The Hottentot” 3rd Act 













>{- 





















• • •• • * • 
























THE HOTTENTOT 


Scene Plot. 
Light Plot. 
Property Plot. 


PROPERTY PLOT 


ACT I 


Ground cloth. 

Large rug. 

Three small rugs, one in arch r., one in arch l., 
one in French window up c. 

Fireplace, against wall R. Floor boards, grate, and¬ 
irons, fire-tongs, etc. 

Davenport, facing fireplace, two pillows. 

Davenport table, r.c. 

Armchair, r. of table. 

Straight chair, l. of table. 

Straight chair, up l.c. near French windows. 

Settee, down l. 

Cabinet, against wall l. 

Wicker settee, on porch, outside French windows. 
Two pillows. 

Flower-box and flowers, on porch rail, back of 
settee. 

Velvet curtains, four pairs. One in arch up r. 
Three pairs in French windows. 

Velvet valances, four. One in arch up r., one 
in center window, two in arches up l. 

Lace curtains, three pairs, for French windows. 

Small console table, in hallway up r. Bronze vase 
on table. 

Trophy cups, seven. Three over fireplace, four 
on cabinet l. 


112 



THE HOTTENTOT 113 

HAND PROPS 
ACT I 
On Stage 

On table R. Telephone. Cigarette humidor and 
cigarettes. 

On table r. Ash tray and matches. Silver tray, on 
which are small decanter of “whiskey/’ high¬ 
ball glass and whiskey glass. Tap-bell. 

On cabinet L. Jockey blouse and cap. Large trophy 
cup. Sewing-basket, with needle, thread, thim¬ 
ble and scissors. 

Off stage L. Marble slab and horse effects. Horse’s 
bridle. Horse hair. Cigar. Can of No. 14 
powder, for dirt. Watch, for Sam. 

Off stage R. Small silver tray. Six whiskey glasses. 
Decanter of “whiskey.” Five letters. Bottle 
of liniment. Mirror (small, hand). Whisk- 
broom. Comb. Pair of military brushes. 
Lady’s riding crop. Two men’s riding crops. 

ACT TWO 
Same as Act I 
Additional Hand Props 

On stage. Book, “Rules of Bridge.” On table r. 

Off stage l. Bridge score pad and pencil. 

Off stage R. Beer-keg, for blasting effect. Shot-gun, 
for blasting effect. Two pocket notebooks and 
two pencils for Larry and Ollie. Wooden 
tea-tray, on which are sugar bowl filled with 
sugar. Two demi-tasse cups of coffee, two 
demi-tasse spoons, sugar tongs and two servi¬ 
ettes. Three bundles, odd sizes, for Swift. 
Newspaper. 


THE HOTTENTOT 

ACT III 


114 


Ground cloth. 

Large grass mat, running across stage in “three.” 

Two smaller grass mats. One right. One left. 

Touring car. Center stage facing down left, di¬ 
agonally. 

Six trees. Three left, two right, one up center. 

Two vines for fence, left. 

Folding-table down right center, with white cloth. 

Two folding-chairs, one each side of table. 

Auto lunch kit, with fittings. Against first wood 
wing right. 

Hand Props 

On table. Two bottle of “whiskey.” Four whiskey 
glasses. Two highball glasses. Cigarette hu¬ 
midor and cigarettes (same as Act I). Ash¬ 
tray and matches. Three napkins. Salt and 
pepper shakers. One seltzer bottle. Iron brace 
under table, up stage side, for breaking mirror. 

In car. Three pair of field-glasses, two in front 
seat, one in back seat. 

Off stage R. Leather traveling bag, in which are 
Sam Harrington’s jockey boots, cap and whip. 
A child’s whip, about a foot and a half long 
with a whistle in the end. A breakaway mir¬ 
ror, plain glass, broken each show. 

Off stage l. Large trophy cup (Act I) with blue 
and white ribbons tied to it. Wedding ring for 
Mrs. Chadwick. Jockey whips for Larry 
Crawford and Alec Fairfax. 

ELECTRICAL PLOT 
ACT I 


Foots, amber and white, full up. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


ii5 

X-Ray border, amber, straw, pink. 

Eight 1,000-watt hanging lamps in four. (On back 
drop.) 

One 29-light strip behind ground-row. (On back 
drop center). 

One 10-light strip behind porch railing. 

One bunch-light in entrance up L. 

One bunch-light in first entrance up R. 

One 4-light strip in second entrance up r. 

One 1,000-watt floor lamp on back drop r. 

Two 1,000-watt floor lamps on back drop l. 

On the scene. Telephone bell, in small window 
up c. Telephone battery-box, ofif stage r. 

(The following not lighted until Act II.) 

Three 2-light brackets on back wall of set. 

Two Italian floor lamps, r. and l. of fireplace. 

One 3-light hanging lamp in second entrance up r. 
One 1-light hanging lamp in arch over entrance 

up L. 

Two 3-light candlesticks on cabinet l. (Not wired.) 
(All lights amber, unless otherwise noted.) 


ACT II 

Same as Act L Light blue, in 1,000-watt floor 
lamps on back drop. Strips out. 1,000-watt 
hanging lamps out. All floor lamps, hanging 
lamps and brackets on scene lighted. 


ACT III 

Foots, white and amber, full up. 


THE HOTTENTOT 


116 

House borders full up. 

X-Ray border in “one.” 

Four 1,000-watt hanging lamps in “two.” 

Four 1,000-watt hanging lamps in “three.” 

Eight 1,000-watt hanging lamps in “four.” (Be¬ 
hind cut drop.) 

One 1,000-watt floor lamp in each entrance, right 
and left. (Four each side.) 

Two 20-light strips behind cut drop. 

(All lights amber.) 



SC ENE DESIGN FOR. 

THE HOTTENTOT 










































sm INC, - Hi Cl 3 



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THE HOTTENTOT 

















BILLETED. 

A comedy In 3 acts, by F. Tennison Jesse and H. Harwood. 4 
males, 5 females. One easy interior seen-?. A charming comedy, 
constructed with uncommon skill, and abounds with clever lines. 
Margaret Anglin’s big success. Amateurs will find this comedy easy 
to produce and popular with all audiences. Price, 69 Cents. 


NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH. 

A comedy in 3 acts. By James Montgomery. S males, 6 females. 
Costumes, modern. Two interior scenes. Plays 2 J 4 hours. 

Is it possible to tell the absolute truth—even for twenty-four hours? 
It is—at least Bob Bennett, the hero of “Nothing But the Truth,” 
accomplished the feat. The bet he made with his business partners, 
and the trouble he got into—with his partners, his friends, and his 
fiancee—this is the subject of William Collier’s tremendous comedy 
hit. “Nothing But the Truth” can be whole-heartedly recommended 
as one of the most sprightly, amusing and popular comedies that this 
country pyj boast. Price, 60 Cents. 


IN WALKED JIMMY. 

A comedy in 4 acts, by Minnie Z. Jaffa. 10 males, 2 females (al¬ 
though any number of males and females may be used as clerks, 
etc.). Two interior scenes. Costumes, modern. Plays 2 y 2 hours. 
The thing into which Jimmy walked was a broken-dov/n shoe factory, 
when the clerks had all been fired, and when the proprietor was in 
serious contemplation of suicide. 

Jimmy, nothing else but plain Jimmy, would have been a mysterious 
figure had it not been for his matter-of-fact manner, his smile and 
his everlasting humanness. He put the shoe business on its feet, won 
the heart of the girl clerk, saved her erring brother from jail, escaped 
that place as a permanent boarding house himself, and foiled the 
villain. 

Clean, wholesome comedy with just a touch of human nature, just 
a dash of excitement and more than a little bit of true philosophy 
make “In Walked Jimmy” one of the most delightful of plays. 
Jimmy is full of the religion of life, the religion of happiness and 
the religion of helpfulness, and he so permeates the atmosphere with 
his “religion” that everyone is happy. The spirit of optimism, good 
cheer, and hearty laughter dominates the play. There is not a dull 
moment in any of the four acts. We strongly recommend it. 

Price, 60 Cents. 


MARTHA BY-THE-DAY. 

An optimistic comedy in three acts, by Julie M. Lippmann, author 
of the “Martha” stories. 5 males, 5 females. Three interior scenes. 
Costumes modern. Plays 2 \\ hours. 

It is altogether a gentle thing, this play. It is full of quaint hu¬ 
mor, old-fashioned, homely sentiment, the kind that people who see 
the play will recall and chuckle over to-morrow and the next day. 

Miss Lippmann has herself adapted her very successful book for 
stage service, and in doing this has selected from her novel the most 
telling incidents, infectious comedy and homely sentiment for the 
play, and the result is thoroughly delightful. Price, 60 Cents. 

(The Above Are Subject to Royalty When Produced) 


SAMUEL FRENCH, 28-30 We»t 38th Street, New York City 

Haw cod Explicit Descriptive CaWopre Mailed Free on Reqnast 



DOROTHY’S NEIGHBORS. 

A brand new comedy in four acts, by Marie Doran, author of “The 
New Co-Ed,” “Tempest and Sunshine,” and many other successful 
plays. 4 males, 7 females. The scenes are extremely easy to 
arrange; two plain interiors and one exterior, a garden, or, if neces¬ 
sary, the two interiors will answer. Costumes modern. Plays 2 J 4 
hours. 

The story is about vocational training, a subject now widely dis¬ 
cussed; also, the distribution of large wealth. 

Back of the comedy situation and snappy dialogue there is good 
logic and a sound moral in this pretty play, which is worthy the 
attention of the experienced amateur. It is a clean, wholesome play, 
particularly suited to high school production. Price, 30 Cents. 


MISS SOMEBODY ELSE. 

A modern play in four acts by Marion Short, author of “The 
Touchdown,” etc. 6 males, 10 females. Two interior scenes. Cos¬ 
tumes modern. Plays hours. 

This delightful comedy has gripping dramatic moments, unusual 
character types, a striking and original plot and is essentially modem 
in theme and treatment. The stcry concerns the advetures of Con¬ 
stance Darcy, a multi-millionaire’s young daughter. Constance em¬ 
barks on a trip to find a young man who had been in her father’s 
employ and had stolen a large sum of money. She almost succeeds, 
when suddenly all traces of the young man are lost. At this point 
she meets some old friends who are living in almost want and, in 
order to assist them through motives benevolent, she determines to 
sink her own aristocratic personality in that of a refined but humble 
little Irish waitress with the family that are in want. She not only 
carries her scheme to success in assisting the family, but finds 
romance and much tense and lively adventure during the period of 
her incognito, aside from capturing the young man who had defrauded 
her father. The story is full of bright comedy lines and dramatic 
situations and is highly' recommended for amateur production. This 
is one of the best comedies we have ever offered with a large num¬ 
ber of female characters. The dialogue is bright and the play is full 
of action from start to finish; not a (full moment in it. This is a 
great comedy for high schools and colleges, and the wholesome story 
will please the parents and teachers. Wc strongly recommend it. 

Price, 30 Cents. 


PURPLE AND FINE LINEN. 

An exceptionally pretty comedy of Puritan New England, in three 
acts, by Amita B. Fairgrieve and Helena Miller. 9 male, 5 female 
characters. 

This is the Lend A Hand Smith College prize play. It is an ad¬ 
mirable play for amateurs, is rich in character portrayal of varied 
types and is not too difficult while thoroughly pleasing. 

Price, 30 Cent*. 

(The Above Are Subject to Royalty When Produced) 


SAMUEL FRENCH, 28*30 West 3Sth Street, New York City 

Hsw aat$ Explicit Descriptive Catalogue bailed Frw on RaquMt 



THE REJUVENATION OF AUNT MARY. 

The famous comedy in three acts, by Anne Warner. 7 males, 6 
females. Three interior scenes. Costumes modern. Plays 2& hours. 

This^ is a genuinely funny comedy with splendid parts for “Aunt 
Mary,” “Jack,” her lively nephew; "Lucinda,” a New England an¬ 
cient maid of all work; “Jack's” three chums; the Qirl “Jack” loves; 

Joshua,” Aunt Mary’s hiaed man, etc. 

“Aunt Mary” was played by May Robson in New York and on tour 
for over two years, and it is sure to be a big success wherever pro 
dnoed. _We strongly recommend it, Price, 60 Cent* 


MRS. BUMSTEAD-LEIGH. 

A pleasing comedy, in three acts, by Harry James Smith, author of 
“The Tailor-Made Man.” 6 males, 6 females. One interior scene. 
Costumes modern. Plays 2# hours. 

Mr. Smith chose for his initial comedy the complications arising 
from the endeavors of a social climber to land herself in the altitude 
peopled by hyphenated names—a theme permitting innumerable com 
1 plications, according to the spirit of the writer. 

This most successful comedy was toured for several seasons by Mrs. 
Flake with enormous success. Price, 60 Cents. 


MRS. TEMPLE'S TELEGRAM. 

A most successful farce in three acts, by Frank Wyatt and Wil¬ 
liam Morris. 5 males, 4 females. One interior scene stands through¬ 
out the three acts. Costumes modern. Plays 2 54 hours. 

“Mrs. Temple’s Telegram” is a sprightly farce in which there ia 
an abundance of fun without any taint of impropriety or any ele¬ 
ment of offence. As noticed by Sir Walter Scott, “Oh, what a 
tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.” 

There is not a dull moment in the entire farce, and from the time 
the curtain rises until it makes the final drop the fun is fast and 
furious. A s 3 ! cry exceptional farce. Price, 60 Cents. 


THE NEW CO-ED. 

A ©weedy in four acts, by Marie Doran, author of “Tempest and 
Sonabine,” etc. Characters, 4 males, 7 females, though any number 
of boys and girls can be introduced in the action of the play. One 
interior and one exterior scene, but can be easily played in one inte¬ 
rior scene. Costumes modern. Time, about 2 hours. 

The theme this play is the coming of a new student to the col 
lege, her reception by the scholars, her trials and final triumph. 

There are three especially good girls’ parts, Letty, Madge and 
Estelle, but the others have plenty to do. “Punch” Doolittle and 
George Washington Watts, a gentleman of color, are two particularly 
good comedy characters. We can strongly recommend “The New 
Co-Ed” to high schools and amateurs. Price, 30 Cents. 

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SAMUEL FRENCH 

Oldest Play Publisher in the World 


28-30 West 38th Street, NEW YORK CITY 










































































































































































































































































































































































































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